Cherries go all out when they go to festivals. You’ll probably see loads of them, running around in pie-dyed shirts.
Did you hear about the cheese factory that exploded? De-brie went everywhere!
Why did the Oreo go to the dentist? Because it lost its filling.
You know what they say about ice cream parents?
They play flavorites.
Bananas, for breakfast, are such an a-peeling choice.
I went to an English camping party with some vegetables. We stayed in a tea-pea.
My wife asked if I'd be available to drain some vegetables next week.
I said I'd check my colander.
Do you know what you call it when you place beef between two slices of bread? You get a bull-only sandwich.
Udon even know how to cook this udon recipe. Fortunately, I can teach you.
Why does the jellybean go to school? Because he wants to become a smartie.
Fruit puns intended
Does he avacado? Because If not you should let that mango.
What do you call a nut that is crazy about exercise? A health nut.
Grandma: Do you like Hummus? Me: I love Hummus....and I sometimes like to singus!
I love you a tot!
Why didn’t I believe what the cheese salesman told me?
It was too gouda to be true.
Our daughter eats her corn one kernel at a time.
She's a unicorn.
She'll take whatever beans necessary to get her daily cup of coffee. Whatever. Beans. Necessary.
What word backwards can predict the future? Cookies (Seikooc as in psychic of you say it).
What do you call the king of vegetables? Elvis Parsley.
What kind of tea did the American colonists want? Liberty.
There are two types of people in this world: People who love chocolate and liars. A study says that chocolate may lower your chances of a stroke. That is, a swimming stroke, a golf stroke, a tennis stroke.
I was surprised at the number of onions needed for this dish- it calls for shallot of onions.
Why did the cheese get in trouble?
It was up to no gouda.
What did the coffee say to its date? Hey there, hot stuff.
Why is it called Almond Milk?
Because no one would buy it if it was called Nut Juice.
What do dogs love to eat for breakfast?
woofles
Did you hear about the flatmate who woke up to a spicy toothbrush? He had it cumin.
What do you call a girl watermelon cop on the beat? A water fe-melon duty.
I mashed a few mangoes, pineapples, melons, strawberries, and grapes into a pot. Served the mash to guests visiting my place.
Called the dish, Mea Pulpa.
What do you call a walnut in a narwal costume? A nar-walnut.
Why did the donut go to the doctor?
He was feeling crumby.
What does a cat like to eat on his birthday?
Mice cream and cake!
I have a friend who has been diagnosed with a phobia of sausages. She always fears the wurst.
What type of wine is notorious for making you drowsy?
Sauvign-yawn blanc!
How do you milk sheep ?
Release another iPhone.
I like my wine sweet and my humor dry.
I slept with a lemon once. Now I have lemonaids.
What do you call cheese that is sad? Blue cheese.
Pigs, when out in public, have to keep an eye on their valuables as they are vulnerable to pigpockets.
In the middle of the night yesterday, I dreamt that I was swimming in a sea of oranges only to wake up and realize that it was just a Fanta-sea.
It’s common for people with heartbreaks to crumble.
Why did I start making a cherry pie? Bake-cause I love it.
Q: Who is Peach’s favorite actor?
A: Brad Pit.
I was asked why I love to clean lemon juice from windows, to which I replied
“It’s easy peasy lemon squeegee.”
What kind of cheese do alcoholics eat?
Livarot.
I've been hitting the bottle pretty hard recently.
Still can't get the last of that ketchup out.
Thanks to you, I’m saddled with unnecessary peelings.
We are thinking of spending the night at the peach house, by the shore.
How do you get a raise at the bread factory?
Butter up your boss.
What do you get if you cross a lemon with a dinosaur
Tyrannosourest Rex.
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