What did the daddy potato say to his son before his soccer game? I’m rooting for you!
What do you call a potato that smokes weed? A baked potato.
I like you a latke!
We’re a perfect mash.
Why was the potato put in an asylum? It was starch raving mad.
What do you call a lazy spud? A couch potato.
I met a girl that owned three french-fry factories. I was impressed but to her it was just small potatoes.
What do you call a potato that’s reluctant to jump into boiling water? A hesi-tater.
What do potatoes become when they smoke weed?
Baked potatoes.
When potato chips don’t sell fast enough, the maker knows it will soon be crunch time.
Potatoes that are medi-tators maintain calm and peace even when uprooted.
A potato gave a gift to his girlfriend.She said, “Aww, why are you so sweet? ”He said, “It’s just the
way I yam.”
Why did the potato wear socks?
To keep his pota-toes warm.
People order potatoes a lot because they look a-peeling on the menu.
I miss you! I’ll see you tater!
How does a potato win at Street Fighter? By mashing the kick button.
Happy Birthday to my best spud….get it? ? Spud…bud? ?
What is a potato’s favorite baseball team? The New York Yamkees
My love for you sprouts more and more everyday!
What do you call a potato at a football game? A spec-tater.
“I can’t breathe” One potato said to the other. “What happened? ” The other said. The potato replied “I
feel I dropped my nose somewhere”
What do you call a spinning potato? A rotate-o.
I love you a tot!
If we played hot potato I’d lose, because I’d never let you go.
What is a potato’s life philosophy? I think, therefore I yam.
What do you get when it rains potatoes? Spuddles.
All potato puns are pomme de terrible.
What do you get when if you cross a potato and the terminator?
A termitator.
Why do potatoes make good detectives? Because they keep their eyes peeled.
I yam rooting for you my sweet potato and I won't mash your heart
John, you have so much po(tato)tential!
Time fries when you’re having fun!
What do you say to an angry 300-pound baked potato? Anything, just butter him up.
What do you call a stolen yam? A hot potato.
Potatoes have skin. I have skin. Ergo, I am a potato
Where does a potato go to college? DeFry
What do you call a person who spends a lot of time sitting and staring at potatoes? A medi-tator.
What kind of potatoes are in the best shape? Hash browns; they’re totally shredded!
Boil ’em, mash ’em, stick ’em in a stew. Happy Birthday from me to you!
How do you know when a potato is in a bad mood? When they are acting salty
If you’re looking for potato puns, you can count on me to chip in.
Potato puns are a-peeling.
What’s a potato’s least favorite dance? The Mash Potato.
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