Where does a potato go to college? DeFry
What’s a potato’s favorite TV program? Starch Trek.
What do you get when it rains potatoes? Spuddles.
How do you know when a potato is high? When it looks baked!
We’re a perfect mash.
What do you call a potato that has turned to the dark side? Vader tots!
Why wouldn’t the reporter leave the mashed potatoes alone? He desperately wanted a scoop.
The sweet potato asked the other potato : “How are my eyes? ”
All potato puns are pomme de terrible.
What do you call a person who spends a lot of time sitting and staring at potatoes? A medi-tator.
“I can’t breathe” One potato said to the other. “What happened? ” The other said. The potato replied “I
feel I dropped my nose somewhere”
Everything in this world is either a potato or not a potato
I yam always very happy to eat sweet potatoes.
What’s a potatoes favorite horror movie? The Silence of the Yams.
Why didn’t the mother potato want her daughter to marry the famous newscaster? Because he was a common-tater.
What do you call a potato that smokes weed? A baked potato.
Why do potatoes make good detectives? Because they keep their eyes peeled.
“How was your day? ” “It was a total disas-tater”
When potato chips don’t sell fast enough, the maker knows it will soon be crunch time.
Who is a potato’s favorite author? Edgar Allen Poe-tato.
What do you call a spinning potato? A rotate-o.
“We are experiencing slight tuber-lence on the flight”
Time fries when you’re having fun!
Potato puns are a-peeling.
Boil ’em, mash ’em, stick ’em in a stew. Happy Birthday from me to you!
What do you call a potato that’s reluctant to jump into boiling water? A hesi-tater.
I miss you! I’ll see you tater!
When it started raining, I spotted a potato across the road pretty fast and I wondered what’s up? It wasn’t long before I saw a fork up ahead.
Did you hear about the potato that got its head chopped off? It was decap-potatoed.
Why shouldn’t you tell a secret on a farm? Because the potatoes have eyes and the corn has ears.
Why was the sweet potato too shy to ask out the russet potato? Because he was a real spud.
Who is the most powerful potato? Darth Tater.
Tony, where do I even starch? I yam so happy we’re best spuds!
Happy Birthday to my best spud….get it? ? Spud…bud? ?
I like you a latke!
Why don't potatoes go to parties?
They're scared of the Monster Mash.
How does a potato win at Street Fighter? By mashing the kick button.
John, you have so much po(tato)tential!
What do you call a baby potato? Small fry.
What do you call a baby potato? Tater tots!
What’s a potato’s least favorite dance? The Mash Potato.
Potatoes that are medi-tators maintain calm and peace even when uprooted.
What kind of potatoes are in the best shape? Hash browns; they’re totally shredded!
Why was the potato put in an asylum? It was starch raving mad.
What is a potato’s favorite baseball team? The New York Yamkees
Thanks to you, I’m saddled with unnecessary peelings.
A potato gave a gift to his girlfriend.She said, “Aww, why are you so sweet? ”He said, “It’s just the
way I yam.”
What do you call an everyday potato? A commentater!
What is a potato’s life philosophy? I think, therefore I yam.
Why did the potato wear socks?
To keep his pota-toes warm.
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