An inspirational speaker came to speak at the fruit stand today. He told us to peach for the stars.
Q: What’s a nectarine?
A: A peach with balding problems.
On Valentine's Day, the peach said to his wife, "You will always have a peach of my heart!"
Why was the peach so sad at the funeral? It left a deep pit in its heart.
Q: Why could the fruits not see anything?
A: It was peach black there.
The kindergarten kids were taught the alphabet and peach sounds at school.
What's a vampire's most favorite fruit? It must be a neck-tarine peach.
Why did the peach think he was a pear for a while? He was feeling awfully green at first, but eventually his face became red.
What do we call the period in between eating a peach? – It is called a pit stop.
Which tool does a peach biologist often use for its experiment? – A peachtree dish (Petri dish).
Q: What would a peach love to pet?
A: A Pit Bull.
Son: Hey dad, I stole a peach from the grocery store today.
Dad: Why?
Son: I don’t know, but I feel guilty. It’s a real pit in my stomach.
If you are wondering about the most important constitutional right of a peach citizen, well, it's none other than freedom of peach.
Q: What is a peach’s favorite book?
A: War and Peach
I just hear that the woman who lives next door and loves fruit died. I hope she would rest in peach.
Sometimes, all you need is to shake a few trees to find the perfect peach for you.
While breaking up with Princess Peach, Mario said "You are so peachy, I can't take it anymore".
What would a potato say to a peach? – “You have a nice pit!”
Q: Why was the fruit not selected for the singing competition?
A: He has a flat peach.
If you are wondering about a peach's favorite video game, well it's definitely 'Super Princess Peach'.
The fruit politician is losing its support in the country because of hate peach.
What song was the peach listening to? 'Stronger with Peach Tear'.
What does a cherry say when it delivers bad news? Don't fruit the messenger.The Peach President lost the presidential race because he got im-peached.
My mother says: “Leave that peach cobbler alone on the table!” However, I cannot help myself and sneak in to watch it making beautiful peach shoes.
The fruit started to stutter as it was suffering from peach deterioration.
During the summer break, I enrolled myself in a peach coding course.
The United Nations gave its members a basket of peaches on 21 September - the International Peach Day.
The only fruit that makes me feel fuzzy and warm is a peach.
He was showing off his new gaming gadget, "it has the latest peach recognition technology" he said.
What would a peach say to its girlfriend or boyfriend? – “You will always have a peach of my heart, baby!”
Why did the daddy peach teach the child peach to shave? He was starting to grow peach fuzz.
Where do you put nectarines when you want to freeze them? Inside the peach-zer.
Mom: Why did you shave the peaches!
Dad: The recipe asked for nectarines.
Interesting fact: A nectarine can also be a peach if it does not have peach fuzz.
A sad peach can be really pit-iful, sometimes.
What do fruit wear when they go swimming? A one-peach bathing suit.
Q: What kind of desserts does a turkey like?
A: Peach gobbler.
A peach biologist was looking for a peach-tree-dish for his upcoming experiment.
Whenever the peach father gets mad at his son, he just screams loudly: “You are the son of a peach!”
While leaving, the peach friend told his sad buddy, "If you need any help, just peach out, I will be there."
The peach started acting all funny because it was really fuzzy.
When I got mugged on my way back from the greengrocers, I was peach-less!
A fruit was madly in love, it was peachy–keen.
Why did the fruit run for president? He wanted world peach.
Q: Why did the fruit go to the salon?
A: To peach her hair blonde.
"Personally, I like people who peach on time, and are always punctual," said the strawberry.
Q: What happened to the peach who went to meet the knife?
A: He came back in many peaches.
The fruit stutters because it suffers from a peach impediment.
One should always practice what they peach.
Do you know why does your mother often shave a peach when cooking? Because she only needs nectarines for the recipe.
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