When the baby onion was misbehaving, the father onion told it, "You better behave, you cheeky chops!"
During the battle between the two onion kings, one of them was on the back foot as it was leek-ing blood.
What is the only way one does not have to cry while cutting onions? They simply don't have to form emotional bonds with it.
My biology class was going on and on, and I was stuck in the middle of it. Well, you know, this is how it feels to be an on-i-on.
Have you seen that film about the onion that turns into a spider?
It's called Shallot's Web
What do you call an onion that keeps on jumping up and down? You call it a spring onion!
To which tier of fruits and vegetables do onions belong? They belong to the teary.
I got a packet of onions from the supermarket yesterday. Somehow, by today, all of them have disappeared. Guess this is why the shopkeeper warned me not to buy Bermuda Onions.
What do all the onions decide to do over unfair wages? They decide to form a labor onion.
What happened when the onion tried to cross the bridge guarded by Gandalf? Gandalf shouted, "You shallot pass this bridge!"
What do you get when you put the number 3.14 in the middle of the onions? You get o-pi-nions!
What do you call an onion that is very valuable to jewelers? You call it a pearl onion.
The onion husband and wife had a fight, and she told him that he shouldn't have exposed all his layers because it was making her cry.
What is the name of the onion ring that cannot but be funny? It is a Funyon!
I used to sell loose onions
Until I got the sack
What do you say happened to an onion who got what it deserved? You say it got karma-lized.
At the bar mitzvah ceremony, the Jewish onion greeted his uncle by saying 'Shallot'.
What do you call an onion monk who is present everywhere? Ommnion!
Although many other vegetables live above the ground, onions live underground. This is because they have many lairs.
What kind of chips do you eat in the bath?
Shower cream and onion.
How will the other onions remember the onion that died? It will be forever minced!
What does an onion say when you are upset because of it one day? It says, "I am sorry that I made you cry!"
What was the event of the onion family getting back together called as? A family reonion.
There was a bull in the neighborhood who would always vandalize my farm. Guess it was because I harvested Spanish onions.
An onion just told me a joke.
I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
What did the two onions who were lovers say to each other before being separated? "Our love will forever go-nion on!"
The old and wise onion had once told me that life is similar to onions. Whenever we peel off our protective layers, we end up crying.
My wife said that onions are the only vegetable that makes her cry
So I threw a pumpkin at her
I was making a salad the other day, and I thought I heard a small red vegetable that was a bit like an onion whispering. Must have been a hoarse radish.
Onions are great at being psychologists as they let people cry their hearts out in front of them.
I walked into the kitchen and saw my wife chopping onions which made me cry
Onions was a good dog
In the history class, the onion teachers taught the student onions that during the vegetable cold war, the Soviet Onion was a superpower.
Where do you most often find onions having a drink? In the salad bar.
What's brown and rhymes with Snoop?
French onion soup.
What do you say to a small onion that has helped you?
Thanks shallot.
What do you call an onion who wants to go on romantic dates in Paris? A French onion.
What happens when an onion burps at the most awkward time? It releases tear gas.
What do you call one green onion that doesn't listen to anyone and is very naughty? It is called a rapscallion!
Did you hear what happened between the cook and the onion?
I think there was a fight. It got a little dicey and tears were shed.
In my friend's house, I saw an onion ring. So, I picked it up and answered it.
Onions are unable to store water inside them because there is always a leek.
The onion teacher was teaching her onion students about figures of speech. Today, she was teaching onionomatopia.
Which venue did all the vegetables choose to open their fighting club in? An onion ring!
What is the smallest onion known as? It is known as an electronion.
Which is the fanciest onion? A cocktail onion.
While cutting the onions, my eyes were leek-ing tears
I was very surprised to hear those insane rapping skills from my green onions. It had lived up to its name of rapscallion.
What is the onion that laughs a lot and is small and white in color? It is a tickled onion.
As two onions were crossing the road, one of them was run over by a car. Upon being rushed to the hospital, the doctor informed the other onion, "I have some news that is going to make you cry!"
Worried about overcooking your onion?
Don't sweat it.
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