What did the farmer yell out when ducks invaded his dairy farm? Cheese and crackers!
What’s a milk’s favorite fruit? Cow-conuts.
Why did no one drink the youngest milk? Its parents spoiled it.
Did you hear what happened to the girl who twisted her ankle in the cow’s pen? She was milking her injury!
What if soy milk is just regular milk that's trying to introduce itself in Spanish?
I'm worried that the milk I got this morning was from a cloned cow. It tasted exactly like the milk I had yesterday.
I replaced the milk in the carton with lemon juice. Everyone was really sour about it.
Dad: How does a farmer keep his cows in line?
Kids: How?
Dad: He keeps them a-cow-ntable!
What do you get when you drink milk
A moostache
What did the man say after his boss threw cheese, milk, and creamer in his face? How dairy!
What would you call someone who cheats others while selling milk? A skim artist.
Did you hear about the cow that committed murder? It was in cow-ld blood! How dairy.
Why do workers at the dairy factory always need a charger? Their milk is stuck at 1%.
Dad: Did you hear about the cow that was arrested?
Kids: No.
Dad: He was uddermining the authorities.
I waited over an hour for my cappuccino and when it arrived there was too much milk and not enough coffee. Still, better latte than never.
I went into the library and asked for pint of milk. The librarian said 'this is a library'. So i whispered 'I'd like a pint of milk please'.
Where do Russians get all of their milk from? Mos-cow!
What do you call yogurt that is terrified of other dairy products? A cow-ard!
My friend is always trying to make cows nervous. She's a fan of milkshakes.
Why is milk taller than you?
Because it's always pasteurize
What do you call a cow that only produces almond milk? One that went nuts.
So I asked Satan if he had any milk I could drink...
He told me "No whey in Hell!"
Why did the cow fall down while being milked? Because the rug was pulled out from udder it.
I tried to milk my cow last night, but nothing I did seemed to work. It was an udder failure.
I bought a really small cow last week. I really wanted to try condensed milk.
Did you know milk is the fastest liquid in existence? It’s pasteurized before you ever notice.
Where do they make all the decisions on a dairy farm? At the city cow-ncil.
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