Why was the well done steak a terrible gossip? It wasn't juicy enough!
What kind of face cream does a strawberry buys?
Blackhead removal cream and scrub
Wondering about a peach's favorite sci-fi novel? It's 'When You Peach Me'.
A potato gave a gift to his girlfriend.She said, “Aww, why are you so sweet? ”He said, “It’s just the
way I yam.”
In the middle of the night yesterday, I dreamt that I was swimming in a sea of oranges only to wake up and realize that it was just a Fanta-sea.
What does a loaf of bread say when breaking up with his girlfriend?
You deserve butter.
What is ice cream’s preferred breed of dog?
Dashchundae.
Q: Why did peas jump out of an airplane?
A: They wanted to be air pods.
I don’t wanna taco ‘bout it
When shouldn't you drink a hot beverage? If it's not your cup of tea.
Did you hear about the frozen dessert whose wife had a baby?
Now he’s a popsicle.
The kindergarten kids were taught the alphabet and peach sounds at school.
What cheese should you use to hide a horse? Mascarpone.
The worst type of criminal is he who mugs other people's coffee.
How does a potato win at Street Fighter? By mashing the kick button.
"Everything happens for a riesling, right?"
What do you get from an Alaskan cow ? Ice Cream
Don’t ask me why I love wine. I have my rieslings.
What did the cornfield say when it heard rain coming?
That’s music to my ears!
Cashier: Sir, would you like me to put your milk in a bag?
Dad: I would much rather keep it in the carton!
What is ice cream’s favorite day of the week?
Sundae.
Happy Birthday to my best spud….get it? ? Spud…bud? ?
Can I have some of your avocado?
GUAC NO! I give zero guacs! You need to guac off!
The cold broth is known to have lived in Stock-holm.
The pancake was quiet because it did not like to waffle.
He ordered 6 vodkas, 6 beers and 6 lemonades. The bartender asked if he would like a tray.
"No I have enough to carry as it is."
What did mutter say to paneer? Tu cheese badi hai mast mast.
What drink scares defense lawyers? Guilt-Tea.
What kind of tea did the American colonists want? Liberty.
What is a walnut’s favorite Christmas play? The Nutcracker.
How do you get a raise at the bread factory?
Butter up your boss.
Pigs, when out in public, have to keep an eye on their valuables as they are vulnerable to pigpockets.
Did you hear about the guy who had an addiction to cheddar cheese?
It was only mild.
Why don’t most people enjoy jokes about taco shells?
They’re too corny
What happened to the criminal magician who ate to much salt?
Cardiac arrest.
When you cross a train engine with a strawberry tart, you make a puff pastry.
What do you call a half dozen wolves drinking beer?
A six pack.
You know what they say about ice cream parents?
They play flavorites.
A cabbage said to a DJ “lettuce turnip the beet!”
Why did they put Viagra in chocolate bars? You eat it, She says, "Oh, Oh Henry!"
"Time to wine down."
I introduced chocolate to milk. They did a chocolate milk shake.
What happened to the man who turned into a pistachio?
He became a shell of who he once was.
Where did the milk write everything about her life? In her dairy.
Why do hens lay eggs?
Because if they dropped them, they'd break.
What do you call it when someone hits avocados repeatedly with a hammer?
Gu-whack-a-mole-e.
What do you call a socialite made of cheese?
Paris Stilton.
Why does salt make everything taste better
Because it's sodi-yummm!
After his meal, the cannibal wipes his mouth and says: “My wife cooks the greatest soup in the world. But I will miss her so much.”
What did the guest say when he arrived at the peanut butter’s dinner party?
“Nice spread!”