What do you call a grilled cheese sandwich that's all up in your face? Too close for comfort food.
What happened after an explosion at a French cheese factory? All that was left was de brie.
What did the blind man say after being handed a cheese grater? "That's the most violent book I've ever read."
What covers the floor of the motzarella forest?
Cheese sticks.
What do you tell your friend after she breaks up with a cheese lover?
You’re cheddar off without him!
Why did the parmesan swipe left on the cheddar?
His pick-up line was too cheesey.
What did one cheese say to the other during philosophy class?
“I dis a brie.”
What cheese is made backwards?
Edam.
Why did the cheese shop owner finally quit the business?
He was tired of the daily rind.
Saw a great offer on cheese in Tesco today!
It was buy one get one brie.
How did the cheese professor start class every day?
Oh queso…
What did the aged cheddar say when his mom told him he couldn’t see a movie that was rated R?
“I’m mature for my age.”
What is a cheese lover’s favorite Village People song?
Nacho Man.
How does a cheese tell you they want to be with you?
“I think you and I would look gouda together.”
What did the cheese call himself after he got dumped?
Forever provolone.
What kind of cheese to beavers eat?
Edam.
Why couldn’t the cheese sleep?
He was scared there was a munster under the bed.
Why did the cheese get in trouble?
It was up to no gouda.
What does a cheese say when they look in the mirror in the morning?
Halloumi.
What do you call a piece of cheese that likes to shoot hoops? Swiss!
What is a lions favourite cheese? Roar-quefort
What did Shakespeare say as he was making a cheese plate?
To brie or not to brie.
Which is the Richest Cheese in the world? Paris Stilton.
What did mutter say to paneer? Tu cheese badi hai mast mast.
Why was the cheese asked to leave the restaurant?
The cook said “we don’t serve your rind here”.
Which is the most religious cheese? Swiss, because it is holy.
Why didn’t the chef slice his cheese?
He had grater plans.
What did the Cheese salesman say? That cheese may be Gouda, but this one is Feta!
Why doesn't cheddar like to party with crackers? Someone always cuts the cheese.
Who were the first cheese lovers ever?
Edam and Eve.
What do you call a cheese that is an alcoholic? Livarot
What does a cheese lover say when someone keeps messing around with them?
“You gouda brie kidding!”
What is a lions favourite cheese? Roar-quefort.
What do you call an oriental cheese? Parm-asian
What do you call it when a cheese goes #2?
Fondue-due.
What did one cheddar cheese say to the other cheddar cheese at prom?
Looking sharp!
How do you get a mouse to smile?
Say cheese.
What is a cheese’s favorite kind of philosophy?
Epistemology and fetaphysics.
What did the mom cheese tell the little boy cheese when he got hurt on his bike?
“Gotta take the gouda with the bad.”
How do you get a mouse to smile? Say cheese!
What did the grilled cheese sandwich say to their date?
“You make me melt.”
What is a cheese lover’s favorite rap artist?
Feta wap.
What cheese do beavers like? eDam
How do you share a piece of cheese with a bear?
Caerphilly.
What activity should you do when you’re babysitting little cheeses?
Build a roquefort.
What do you tell a cheese going through a hard time?
Ricotta get through this.
Did you hear about the cheese failed to medal at the olympics? It fell at the final curdle
Why didn’t I believe what the cheese salesman told me?
It was too gouda to be true.
When should you go on a cheese diet? If you need to cheddar a few pounds
What did the street cheese say after he got attacked by several blades? I've felt grater.
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