What is the charge for beating someone with a bottle of olive oil and a can of chick peas ?
Attempted Hummus-ide.
Why did the hummus blush?
Because it saw a chickpea!
I'm going to start a hummus brand that comes in really difficult to open containers.
It's gonna be called 'hummus posta eat this'.
What did the hummus say to the pita bread when he got sick?
I falafel.
What did the fans say to the band named after a famous chickpea spread?
Hummus a tune.
I've been on a real hummus kick lately, so as I came home from work tonight, my sister says to me "You're always bringing home hummus now." To which I replied, "Hummus where the heart is!"
Due to unusually successful harvests of chickpeas this year, the price of hummus is going to fall dramatically.
Buy the dip.
I saw a road sign the other day that said "Dip In Road"
I turned the corner and drove straight into a load of hummus
Predictive Text
It's the scurge of the hummus rice.
Me: I think I'll take a dip in the pool.
Lifeguard: What ya got there?
Me: Hummus.
So I was standing in the grocery store comparing the prices of a couple packs of hummus when my roommate came up to me and suggest the off brand roasted red pepper kind to which I replied:
"Ya, I'm not really sure about that brand. They seem to be very hit and hummus for me."
He was not impressed.
What's the difference between Hummus and Humus?
"mmmm"
I asked the pianist if he could play the Chick Pea Song.
He said, "Maybe. Can you hummus a few bars?'
Man wins award after he died eating appetizers at a Mediterranean restaurant
It was a Post-Hummus award.
Grandma: Do you like Hummus? Me: I love Hummus....and I sometimes like to singus!
What do a pregnancy test and hummus have in common?
They both require a chickpea.
Ugh.. I ate too much hummus..
And now I filafel.
My girlfriend spilt hummus all over her...
Can't believe that chick pea'd herself.
My Ex Girlfriend stole my Hummus.
I told that chick, peace
Did you get a side of hummus?
It's a hummuside.
Where did Vegans come from?
Hummus Sapiens
I was gonna make a joke about Mediterranean food...
But hummus have missed the mark, and now I falafel.
I fed my wife some ground chick peas and she choked to death
The police are treating it as a hummuside.
I can't get my wife to try Mediterranean food.
She doesn't like hummus, which is a naan-starter.
What did one hummus say to the other hummus
“Sabra.”
What is the correct answer to Hummus?
A cow.
Go to BabaMail
