How do you get a musician off your front porch?
Pay for the pizza.
You and I make a deluxe combo.
the difference between a pizza and my pizza jokes?
My pizza jokes can’t be topped!
Damn, look at that pizza! It's an over panchiever.
Join us and let’s make pizza cheese grate again.
“Waiter, will my pizza be long?”
“No sir, it will be round!”
What did the boss say to his pizza during their meeting?
There’s mushroom for improvement.
What does an anteater like on its pizza?
Ant-chovies.
What do pizza delivery guys and porn stars both see too much of?
Stiff tips.
Why did the man go into the pizza business?
He wanted to make some dough.
What did the pizza say to the delivery guy?
“You don’t pepper-own me.”
…and what did the delivery guy say in reply?
“Hey now, don’t get saucy.”
What is a pizza’s favorite movie?
Pie hard.
What does a pizza say when it wants to cuddle?
Fold me close.
What did the doughnut say to the pizza?
If I had as much dough as you, I wouldn’t be hanging around this hole.
Did you hear about the Italian chef with the terminal illness?
He pastaway. Now he’s just a pizza history.
What does a pizza say when it introduces itself to you?
Slice to meet you.
What do you call a sleeping pizza?
A piZZZZZZa.
What type of person doesn’t like pizza?
A weir-dough.
It’s time to think outside the pizza box.
What’s a pizza maker’s favorite song?
Slice, Slice Baby
Pizza: the only time top-less isn't fun
I have so mushroom in my heart for you.
hat did the pizza slicer say when he wanted to rob the pizza?
“Hand over the dough or I’ll cut you!”
I have been trying to write a new pizza joke…
But I can’t work out the delivery.
How can you tell if you are in love?
If they stole a pizza your heart.
Join us for a slice of fun.
What did the pepperoni say to the cook?
You wanna pizza me?
How do you fix a broken pizza?
With tomato paste.
What did the pizza say when it asked the topping out on a date?
I never sausage a beautiful face.
What kind of pizza do you order on Christmas?
Cheeses Crust.
This pizza party is the perfect topping to a great summer.
What pizza do dogs eat?
Puperoni.
What is the best way to stop a pizza curling?
Hide its brush.
What does a pizza wear to smell good?
Calzogne.
Why does the mushroom always get invited to pizza parties?
Because he’s such a fungi!
What did the parmesan say when it broke up with the mozzarella?
Sorry but I am too mature for you.
Why did the hipster burn his lips?
He ate his pizza before it was cool.
I had a goat’s cheese pizza the other day.
He wasn’t happy.
Where do pepperonis go on vacation?
The Leaning Tower of Pizza.
Why was the pizzeria desperate for business?
Because they kneaded the dough!
Why does Satan not eat the bread part of the pizza?
Because he's the Anti-Crust!
I burnt my Hawaiian pizza.
I should have used aloha temperature.
What’s the difference between a delivery driver and the pizza they deliver?
The pizza can feed a family of four.
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