Finally put up the Christmas tree...
It really spruced up the room.
I told my friend a tree pun.
He was stumped.
What side of the tree contains the most leaves? The outside, of course.
Why did the aspen date the poplar? She really found him to be in-tree-guing.
What tree makes fruit that tastes a lot like chicken? Poultree.
What has leaves, is green and a trunk? A houseplant heading on vacation.
Why can’t a Christmas tree sew? It keeps dropping its needles.
Why is it always quiet in the forest? Because all of the trees sleep like a dog.
What did Betula pendula tell her little sister when she was annoyed? Leaf me alone, birch.
What did the rock say after it rolled into a tree? Nothing because rocks can’t talk.
Is it hard to count conifers? It’s as simple as one, two, tree!
Why did the sapling go to the doctor’s office? He was feeling a little green.
My friend has just won the tallest Christmas tree competition
I thought to myself, 'How can you top that?
Why do trees always hold grudges? Because they never fir-get.
Why do trees always hate taking tests? Because they keep getting stumped by the questions.
Did you hear about the bank that wanted to put an ATM up a tree? If it works, they are going to expand the idea to other branches.
Why do some trees hate playing checkers? Because they are true chess-nuts.
If a tree had a mouth, wood it bark?
How the tree introduce themselves to the dentist?
“Implant”
What is the trees favorite fruit? Pine-apple.
Which tree is more annoying, pine or oak?
Pine. Because pine needles while oak leaves.
What did the beaver tell the tree? It has really been nice gnawing you.
Where do birch trees keep their jewelry? In the river bank.
What did the trees wear when they went to a pool party? Swimming trunks.
Why are leaves always getting into risky business? They keep having to go out on a limb.
I fernly beleaf my tree puns are qualitree, you can leaf me alone if you disagreen.
Did you hear about the aspen who fell for the loggers’ scam? The copse wood not believe she fell for it.
Why did the Platanus occidentalis have to go to the doctor more than the other trees? Because it was always sycamore.
What do you call a martial arts expert in a tree?
Bruce Leaf.
What did the eskimo say when he chopped down a tree?
Tim-brrr
Why was the evergreen so lonely in high school? She was always pining to become a part of the poplar kids.
What is a tree’s favorite geometry shape? The treeangle.
Why are trees the largest plant? Because they are truly tree-mendous.
What happens when you blend an artificial waterway with a tree? You get a root canal.
Where did the Adansonia tree go to get a quick trim? To the baobarber.
Why was the tree so embarrassed during the winter? After her leaves fell, she felt naked.
Why are cedars so hard to get along with? They suffer from bigo-tree and ex-tree-mism.
Why do trees always get hired? They have the right qual-leaf-ications.
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