How do you keep the snow from giving you cold feet?
Don’t go around BRRfooted!
What did the snowman order at the fast food restaurant?
An ice burger extra cheese.
I was thinking about using a mushroom to poison someone. My morel stopped me.
My wife wanted to plant flowers
Problem is she hasn’t botany.
My father cooked us mushrooms. Later he asked "Having fun guys"?
What did the water plant worker say when their facility flooded?
Dam.
What is the same shape and size as a sequoia tree, but weighs nothing at all? The tree’s shadow.
What did the teacher say when he sent the naughty student out of the (mush)room? - You’re in big truffle young man!
Why did the Platanus occidentalis have to go to the doctor more than the other trees? Because it was always sycamore.
I always invite the mushroom to my party because he is such a fun-guy.
What do you call a martial arts expert in a tree?
Bruce Leaf.
Did you hear about the aspen who fell for the loggers’ scam? The copse wood not believe she fell for it.
What do you call ten Arctic hares hopping backwards through the snow together?
A receding hare line.
Why are trees such great thieves? They really have sticky fingers.
What did one cactus say to the other cactus ?
"Lookin sharp !"
There’s two balloons in the desert. One says look out for that cactus!
The other goes What Cactussssss...
How much does a flower love their friends?
Bunches.
What is a mushroom’s favorite hobby? - Spore-t!
There is always a first time to everything. For instance, when you take a mushroom either for lunch or dinner, you will be amazed at how magical it is.
Did you hear the joke about the elephant who was stuck in a tree last spring? To get down, she had to sit down on a branch and wait until fall.
Today isn’t the day to be making jokes about the weather.
It’s snow joke.
What has leaves, is green and a trunk? A houseplant heading on vacation.
What did one snowman say to the other snowman?
Do you smell carrots?
Why did the boy keep his trumpet in the freezer?
Because he liked cool music.
What does the birch like to study in school? Chemistree.
I was not allowed to do my stand up act at the mushroom comedy show. I guess I am not a fungi.
What did the flower say after he told a joke?
I was just pollen your leg!
What's the difference between a BMW and a Cactus?
Pricks are on the outside of Cactuses.
Look Honey, a cactus!
I haven't seen that many pricks in one place since your family was in for Thanksgiving!
What did the snowman and his wife put over their baby’s crib?
A snowmobile!
Did you hear about the guy who fell in love with a tree? They say he was a tree hugger.
What do flowers study in college?
STEM.
If a tree had a mouth, wood it bark?
Which tree is more annoying, pine or oak?
Pine. Because pine needles while oak leaves.
What pickup line did the flower use on Tinder?
Are you a DAMNdelion?
What do you call a snowman on rollerblades?
A snowmobile.
A team of mushrooms was playing basketball against a team of cabbages. The mushrooms won. Everyone cheered for the champignons.
What did the conifer say when he finally got alone with his crush? It’s just yew and me, baby.
What do poplars bring to war? They bring their infan-tree.
Why was the evergreen so lonely in high school? She was always pining to become a part of the poplar kids.
Did you hear about the flower who gave an ultimatum to her husband?
She told him once and floral.
Why are cedars so hard to get along with? They suffer from bigo-tree and ex-tree-mism.
Next time you’re feeling down, just remember: your plants are rooting for you. Literally!
How the tree introduce themselves to the dentist?
“Implant”
Why did the frog lose his job on the mushroom farm? He stole the toads-tool.
There are lots of funny jokes about mushrooms that can give you stitches. However, you need to be patient enough because they need time to grow on you.
We all know that rooms are just empty spaces, and no one can even dream of making a delicacy out of them. The only room is the mushroom.
Where did the Adansonia tree go to get a quick trim? To the baobarber.
Why was it hard for police to catch the tree bandit? He had them stumped.
What does the mushroom say to his lover? – “I have so mush-room in my heart for you, baby!”
Why was the tree doctor so good at his job? He could always get to the root of the problem.
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