What did the tree say when it fell down?
"Call pine one one!"
Did you hear the joke about the elephant who was stuck in a tree last spring? To get down, she had to sit down on a branch and wait until fall.
What did the flower say to his wife when he brought her home a present?
I hope thistle cheer you up.
What’s a flower’s favorite band?
Guns n’ Roses.
Did you hear about the guy who fell in love with a tree? They say he was a tree hugger.
What did the flower say after he told a joke?
I was just pollen your leg!
What does the youngest flower child say?
Last bud not least!
During the contribution’s session, the mushroom family never gave a lot. They were just two spore.
In the mushroom bus, one mushroom said to the other, "Please scoot over, there is not mush room."
Why do trees always get hired? They have the right qual-leaf-ications.
What does a flower say when they’re surprised?
What in carnation!
What would Jerry McGuire have said if he was a flower?
You had me at hydrangea.
What did the tree tell the drill? You bore me.
What was the worst crime in the tree kingdom? Tree-son.
What type of room do you eat? A mush room.
The plant was tired of being boring.
It has decided to turn over a new leaf.
What happened when the snowgirl had a fight with the snowboy?
She gave him the cold shoulder.
What did the snowman and his wife put over their baby’s crib?
A snowmobile!
If trees could kill you, they wood.
What do you call flowers who are bffs?
Buds.
I was not allowed to do my stand up act at the mushroom comedy show. I guess I am not a fungi.
Why are Christmas trees so clean? They know how to spruce things up.
What type of car did the mushroom drive by in? A spores car.
Today a large tree suddenly fell over right in front of me.
I was stumped.
What does the mushroom say to his lover? – “I have so mush-room in my heart for you, baby!”
Did you hear about the flower who gave an ultimatum to her husband?
She told him once and floral.
Why did the sapling go to the doctor’s office? He was feeling a little green.
What is it called when a snowman has a temper tantrum?
A meltdown!
What does an alcoholic flower say when they reach out for help?
Lilac the ability to stop.
What did the water plant worker say when their facility flooded?
Dam.
What is a mountains favorite type of candy?
Snow caps.
Where do American trees like to go for vacations in Canada? Montreeal.
If you are preparing jacket potatoes, your choice vegetables should be button mushrooms.
How do trees get onto the internet? They just log on.
The only way the mushroom could think of decorating his house was with toadstools.
Why was the pine tree always in trouble? It kept being knotty.
A mycologist is the most ethical type of scientist. They follow morels closely.
If a tree had a mouth, wood it bark?
What do you call a grandpa flower?
Poppy.
What type of diet did the snowman go on?
The Meltdown Diet.
Why aren’t trees competitive sports fans? They like to root for everyone.
When is a piece of wood made king? when its a ruler
What do you say to a pensive flower?
A peony for your thoughts?
Why are trees such great drivers? They always take the shortest root.
Have you ever heard of mushroom cars? Well, they have an interesting sound which goes line shroom shroom!
Today I helped father-in-law to fix his plants
it was very grounding.
What did the nut tree say when his wife left him? I walnut stand for this!
Where do the mushroom family keep their umbrellas, coats and shoes? In their porch-ini!
What do you call an old snowman?
Water.
Why do trees always walk so slowly? All they can do is lumber around.
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