What did the rock say after it rolled into a tree? Nothing because rocks can’t talk.
What kind of money snowmen use in the North Pole?
Cold cash!
What do Snowmen call their offspring?
Chill-dren.
How do trees get onto the internet? They just log on.
To everyone in the Christmas Tree industry
You all do a great job! Stand up and take a bough!
If your imagination hits peak high and you combine a toadstool and a suitcase, you won’t have mushroom for your vacation clothes.
What type of tree can be put inside your hand? A palm tree.
What did the flower write in his mother’s day card?
I’m proud to be orchid.
The only way the mushroom could think of decorating his house was with toadstools.
Which tree is more annoying, pine or oak?
Pine. Because pine needles while oak leaves.
What happens when you blend an artificial waterway with a tree? You get a root canal.
Why are flowers so good at problem-solving?
They know how to nip things in the bud.
What did the flower tell his son before a big game?
I’m rooting for you.
What do you call a tree with no tinsel, baubles, or topping?
A tree.
If there was to be a beauty contest bringing together all the beautiful mushrooms on the face of the earth, the porta-bella mushroom would carry the day.
My dad works in a steel plant.
He says it's very riveting.
What do snowmen wear on their heads?
Ice caps.
Did you hear about the guy who fell in love with a tree? They say he was a tree hugger.
Why are cedars so hard to get along with? They suffer from bigo-tree and ex-tree-mism.
What do you call it when you plant a tree at each corner of a house?
A fourest.
What do pines eat for breakfast? Past-trees.
What did the mushroom say after the car accident? Help I’m a truffle!
What type of car did the mushroom drive by in? A spores car.
What sort of ball doesn’t bounce?
A snowball!
What is a mushroom’s favorite hobby? - Spore-t!
Today I helped father-in-law to fix his plants
it was very grounding.
What do you call a giant mushroom? Hu-fungus.
Did you hear about the aspen who fell for the loggers’ scam? The copse wood not believe she fell for it.
Did you hear about the lazy flower who finally got his act together?
He just needed a kick in the bud.
Where do birch trees keep their jewelry? In the river bank.
What side of the tree contains the most leaves? The outside, of course.
Why do some trees hate playing checkers? Because they are true chess-nuts.
Why are we only concerned about snowmen not snowwomen?
Because only men are stupid enough to stand out in the snow without a coat.
Why was the evergreen so lonely in high school? She was always pining to become a part of the poplar kids.
I am still trying to launch beef and cream out of a mushroom cannon. It is not stroganoff.
What did the flower say after he told a joke?
I was just pollen your leg!
Why was the pine tree always in trouble? It kept being knotty.
My wife wanted to plant flowers
Problem is she hasn’t botany.
What did the tree say after someone hit it? We should really call the copse.
What pickup line did the flower use on Tinder?
Are you a DAMNdelion?
How do you know flowers are capable of kissing?
They have tulips.
Did you hear about the flower who joined Tinder?
He just wants somebudy to love.
. How can you easily identify a dogwood tree? By listening to the bark.
Where did the Adansonia tree go to get a quick trim? To the baobarber.
What did the grouchy mushroom say to the loud mushroom? - Put a cap on it.
Why did the Sugar Maple have to go to the dentist? It really needed a root canal.
Why are leaves always getting into risky business? They keep having to go out on a limb.
What did the dessert say to the Granny Smith tree?
You’re the apple of my pie.
How do you get down from a tree? You can’t because down comes from ducks.
My friend has just won the tallest Christmas tree competition
I thought to myself, 'How can you top that?
What did the snowman order at the fast food restaurant?
An ice burger extra cheese.
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