Not many people liked the new tree I planted.
It wasn’t very poplar.
Why are trees the largest plant? Because they are truly tree-mendous.
Why do trees always walk so slowly? All they can do is lumber around.
Where do birch trees keep their jewelry? In the river bank.
Why was the sapling crying to her mom? She said the big trees wouldn’t leaf her alone.
What did the tree say when it fell down?
"Call pine one one!"
What did the tree tell the drill? You bore me.
Where do American trees like to go for vacations in Canada? Montreeal.
What is bigger than a Christmas tree?
A Christmas four
Why are cedars so hard to get along with? They suffer from bigo-tree and ex-tree-mism.
What do trees drink at their parties? Root beer.
What do aspens wear to school? A tree-shirt.
. How can you easily identify a dogwood tree? By listening to the bark.
Did you hear about the aspen who fell for the loggers’ scam? The copse wood not believe she fell for it.
A woman who gave birth in a tree was sent to jail
She was charged with treeson
What is it called when a tree stabs his friend in the back?
A be-tree-yal
Don’t ask me for any tree puns.
Acacia haven’t noticed I’m all out.
Why wouldn’t the squirrel collect the oak’s acorns today? She called in sick and then went to the beech.
Why did the sapling go to the doctor’s office? He was feeling a little green.
Why did the aspen date the poplar? She really found him to be in-tree-guing.
What do pines eat for breakfast? Past-trees.
I fernly beleaf my tree puns are qualitree, you can leaf me alone if you disagreen.
Why was it hard for police to catch the tree bandit? He had them stumped.
What does the birch like to study in school? Chemistree.
What weighs more: a pound of logs or a pound of leaves? They weigh the same.
If a tree had a mouth, wood it bark?
What type of motorcycle do London Plane trees like to ride? Treeumph.
What do you call a tree with no tinsel, baubles, or topping?
A tree.
If trees could kill you, they wood.
What did the nut tree say when his wife left him? I walnut stand for this!
Did you hear the joke about the elephant who was stuck in a tree last spring? To get down, she had to sit down on a branch and wait until fall.
What type of tree can be put inside your hand? A palm tree.
Why are trees so active in politics? They really like grass roots movements.
What looks like half a pine tree? The other half.
What did the dessert say to the Granny Smith tree?
You’re the apple of my pie.
Is it hard to count conifers? It’s as simple as one, two, tree!
Did you hear about the guy who fell in love with a tree? They say he was a tree hugger.
What do chic evergreens wear for cruelty-free fashion? Faux fir.
What do you call a martial arts expert in a tree?
Bruce Leaf.
I told my friend a tree pun.
He was stumped.
What is a birch’s favorite dinosaur? The Tree
Rex.
Getting my toy drone stuck in the tree isn’t the worst thing that happened to me today.
But it’s definitely up there.
What is a tree’s favorite geometry shape? The treeangle.
When is a piece of wood made king? when its a ruler
What is the trees favorite fruit? Pine-apple.
Why are trees the best frenemies? They are great at throwing shade.
What types of stories do giant sequoias love to tell? Tall tales, of course.
How the tree introduce themselves to the dentist?
“Implant”
Why are dogwood trees amazing pets? They have a great bark and a wooden bite.
What does a triangle palm like to study in school? Trigonometree.
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