What do you call a tree with no tinsel, baubles, or topping?
A tree.
Don’t ask me for any tree puns.
Acacia haven’t noticed I’m all out.
What is it called when a snowman has a temper tantrum?
A meltdown!
How does a bee travel to a tree? They get on the buzz.
What did the tree tell the drill? You bore me.
What did the tree say after someone hit it? We should really call the copse.
What is it called when a tree has back problems?
ScoliOAKsis
What do chic evergreens wear for cruelty-free fashion? Faux fir.
If you are preparing jacket potatoes, your choice vegetables should be button mushrooms.
Not many people liked the new tree I planted.
It wasn’t very poplar.
What do you call a human that's now a cactus?
A transplant.
How do you get into the mush-room? Ring the porta-bella.
What do you say when you want a kiss from a flower?
Plant one on me.
What would Jerry McGuire have said if he was a flower?
You had me at hydrangea.
What time is it when little white flakes fall past the classroom window?
Snow and Tell.
Why are trees so silly? All of their puns arboring and acorny.
Why was the dogwood always making bad choices? Because he kept barking up the wrong tree.
What types of mushrooms do vegetarians avoid? Oyster mushrooms.
How do you know you’re in love with a flower?
Not a daisy goes by where you don’t think of them.
What do you call a giant mushroom? Hu-fungus.
What do pines eat for breakfast? Past-trees.
I just found out what animal’s been getting into my avocado plants...
It was a guaca-mole.
What does a flower say when they’re surprised?
What in carnation!
What is a flower’s favorite vegetable?
Cauliflower.
What do call a cactus which is shaped like a penis
Dildon’t.
How one snowman greets the other one?
Ice to meet you.
What do you see when an elephant hides behind a tree?
The trunks
What did the grouchy mushroom say to the loud mushroom? - Put a cap on it.
Did you hear about the loggers who stopped cutting down the forest? The trees really felt re-leafed.
What did the flower do when she was challenged?
Rose to the occasion.
What’s the scariest plant?
BamBoo.
What is bigger than a Christmas tree?
A Christmas four
What do snowmen eat for lunch?
Icebergers!
Why did Frosty the snowman want a divorce?
Because he thought his wife was a flake.
Why do trees always get hired? They have the right qual-leaf-ications.
Which tree is more annoying, pine or oak?
Pine. Because pine needles while oak leaves.
What did the snowman eat?
Icebergs with chilli sauce.
How many lips does a flower have?
Tulips.
Mushroom puns are the best for any occasion. They are very portabella.
Why are trees so active in politics? They really like grass roots movements.
Why are trees such great thieves? They really have sticky fingers.
Who did Prince Mushroom fall in love with at the royal ball? - Chanterella!
What do you get when you plant a Donut?
A pastree.
Why were the spruces in a group of three? They like to travel as a tree-o.
How did the pines and firs end their war? With a tree-ty.
What do you call a snowman with a six pack?
An abdominal snowman.
Why don’t trees travel in groups? Because two’s a company, but tree’s a crowd.
What did the teacher say when he sent the naughty student out of the (mush)room? - You’re in big truffle young man!
Why was the tree doctor so good at his job? He could always get to the root of the problem.
What did the Christmas tree tell his crush? I pine for you.
Go to BabaMail
