What do flowers study in college?
STEM.
What do you call a snowman party?
A snowball.
What does an alcoholic flower say when they reach out for help?
Lilac the ability to stop.
What is the hardest part about being a tree? You have so many limbs, but you still can’t walk.
The only way the mushroom could think of decorating his house was with toadstools.
What tree is bought the most at the plant store?
The poplar tree
How does a bee travel to a tree? They get on the buzz.
Which tree is more annoying, pine or oak?
Pine. Because pine needles while oak leaves.
Where do saplings graduate from? Elementree school.
Why are flowers so good at problem-solving?
They know how to nip things in the bud.
What did the flower tell his son before a big game?
I’m rooting for you.
What did Sherlock Holmes say when he caught the Christmas tree bandit? It was elemen-tree, my dear Watt-son.
What’s a good winter tip?
Never catch snowflakes on your tongue until all the birds have flown south for the winter.
Today I helped father-in-law to fix his plants
it was very grounding.
What types of books do pines read? Poetree books.
What type of diet did the snowman go on?
The Meltdown Diet.
I was thinking about using a mushroom to poison someone. My morel stopped me.
What is it called when a tree has back problems?
ScoliOAKsis
How does a Snowman get to work?
By icicle.
If you are preparing jacket potatoes, your choice vegetables should be button mushrooms.
How do you find Will Smith in the snow?
You look for Fresh Prints!
How did the mushroom end up on a vacation abroad? It was just a spore of the moment decision!
To everyone in the Christmas Tree industry
You all do a great job! Stand up and take a bough!
Did you hear about the aspen who fell for the loggers’ scam? The copse wood not believe she fell for it.
Whats a bad flower pick-up line?
Lets put our tulips together?
How does a penguin build a house?
Igloos it together.
How does a mushroom decorate a home? With toadstools.
Why are we only concerned about snowmen not snowwomen?
Because only men are stupid enough to stand out in the snow without a coat.
What do you call a tree with no tinsel, baubles, or topping?
A tree.
Have you ever heard of mushroom cars? Well, they have an interesting sound which goes line shroom shroom!
Finally put up the Christmas tree...
It really spruced up the room.
Farmers were in an all out war to decide which vegetable they would plant
It was resolved with a Peas Treaty.
A woman who gave birth in a tree was sent to jail
She was charged with treeson
What is the trees favorite fruit? Pine-apple.
If a tree had a mouth, wood it bark?
Why is it always quiet in the forest? Because all of the trees sleep like a dog.
Why are Christmas trees so clean? They know how to spruce things up.
Why do trees always walk so slowly? All they can do is lumber around.
What does the birch like to study in school? Chemistree.
What is the favorite Mexican food of snowman?
Brrrr – itos.
What has leaves, is green and a trunk? A houseplant heading on vacation.
Why was the evergreen so lonely in high school? She was always pining to become a part of the poplar kids.
What is the tree’s least favorite month of the year? SepTIMBERRRR.
Mushroom puns are the best for any occasion. They are very portabella.
What does a triangle palm like to study in school? Trigonometree.
What pickup line did the flower use on Tinder?
Are you a DAMNdelion?
Why are trees such great thieves? They really have sticky fingers.
Don’t ask me for any tree puns.
Acacia haven’t noticed I’m all out.
Why was the pine tree always in trouble? It kept being knotty.
Why do trees always get hired? They have the right qual-leaf-ications.
Why didn’t the flower get a second date?
He was garden variety.
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