Farmers were in an all out war to decide which vegetable they would plant
It was resolved with a Peas Treaty.
What do you call a gangsta snowman?
Froze-T.
How do Eskimos make their beds?
With sheets of ice and blankets of snow.
What side of the tree contains the most leaves? The outside, of course.
Why are dogwood trees amazing pets? They have a great bark and a wooden bite.
Why do trees always hate taking tests? Because they keep getting stumped by the questions.
Why was the tree doctor so good at his job? He could always get to the root of the problem.
What do you call a grandpa flower?
Poppy.
What do flowers study in college?
STEM.
What’s a good winter tip?
Never catch snowflakes on your tongue until all the birds have flown south for the winter.
What can you catch in the winter with your eyes closed?
A cold.
Look Honey, a cactus!
I haven't seen that many pricks in one place since your family was in for Thanksgiving!
What do you call a martial arts expert in a tree?
Bruce Leaf.
What type of tree can be put inside your hand? A palm tree.
What did the eskimo say when he chopped down a tree?
Tim-brrr
What's the difference between a BMW and a Cactus?
Pricks are on the outside of Cactuses.
What did the flower say when her son went off to college?
I be-leaf in you.
Why do trees have to drink responsibly? Otherwise, they become a bunch of trunk idiots.
Why do toadstools grow so close to each other? They do not need mushroom to grow.
What would Jerry McGuire have said if he was a flower?
You had me at hydrangea.
What do you get from sitting on the snow too long?
Polaroids!
What do you say to a flower after a breakup?
Get clover it.
Why are trees so active in politics? They really like grass roots movements.
What is it called when a tree has back problems?
ScoliOAKsis
What is the trees favorite fruit? Pine-apple.
How do you know you’re in love with a flower?
Not a daisy goes by where you don’t think of them.
The forager was in such mixed moods this morning and we guessed he picked and ate the wrong class of mushrooms.
Why are trees such great thieves? They really have sticky fingers.
When darkness sets in, fungi much like many other organisms go to sleep, but in mush-rooms.
What do you call flowers who are bffs?
Buds.
How do you get into the mush-room? Ring the porta-bella.
In the mushroom bus, one mushroom said to the other, "Please scoot over, there is not mush room."
When is a piece of wood made king? when its a ruler
What did the snowman order at Wendy’s?
A Frosty.
What happened when the snowgirl had a fight with the snowboy?
She gave him the cold shoulder.
What is a flower’s favorite vegetable?
Cauliflower.
How does a penguin build a house?
Igloos it together.
I wanna tell a joke about a girl who eats plants.
You've probably never heard of herbivore.
What do you call a snowman in the summer?
A Puddle.
Did you hear about the lazy flower who finally got his act together?
He just needed a kick in the bud.
Did you hear about the flower who never bloomed?
It was a bud omen.
What do you call a human that's now a cactus?
A transplant.
Why can’t a Christmas tree sew? It keeps dropping its needles.
What did the flower write in his mother’s day card?
I’m proud to be orchid.
Why did the dunce get hurt after raking leaves? He fell out of the tree.
What did the snowman order at the fast food restaurant?
An ice burger extra cheese.
Why are trees such great drivers? They always take the shortest root.
What do trees drink at their parties? Root beer.
What do you call a snowman party?
A snowball.
How do you describe an acorn in one sentence? In a nutshell, it is an oak tree.