What world-famous rock group has four guys that don't even sing? Mount Rushmore.
The ocean made me salty.
Why are there so many ruts in the ice at the rink?
The maintenance crew must be slipping up.
I don't know if I just got hit by freezing rain, but it hurt like hail.
What do you get if you come fourth in the National Weatherman Awards? A precipitation trophy.
A red ship and a blue ship collided in the ocean.
Apparently the survivors are marooned.
Why are trees so active in politics? They really like grass roots movements.
A mycologist is the most ethical type of scientist. They follow morels closely.
Watson: Sherlock, what type of rock is this amazing specimen?
Holmes: It’s sedimentary, my dear Watson.
A friend of mine is his team's best footballer on paper. Unfortunately, they play most of their games on grass.
What is a cat's favorite color in the rainbow? Purrrrrple of course.
I can sea clearly now.
What do you call a Grizzly at a nude beach?
Bear Naked.
Not many people liked the new tree I planted.
It wasn’t very poplar.
I heard that burglars used grass to pick a lock and gain entry to a local house, but the evidence may have been planted.
What types of plants do you get after you plant kisses? Tulips.
I was struggling to find out how lightning works. And then it struck me.
What did the mushroom say after the car accident? Help I’m a truffle!
The hiker hated the top of the mountain because it was all downhill from there!
What do you call a snowman in the summer?
A Puddle.
How does one raindrop ask another out? Water you doing tonight?
Why are geologists great dates?
They can make your bedrock.
Q: What did the tornado say to the sportscar?
A: I’m taking you for a quick spin!
I hate windy weather. It really blows.
What’s a cetacean’s favorite TV show?
Whale of Fortune.
What did the dessert say to the Granny Smith tree?
You’re the apple of my pie.
What do you call a dinosaur that got stuck in the rain?
A driplodocus.
Wanna know what I said when I got hit by a water gun?
H2Oww
What do Ents wear to the beach?
Sandalwood.
What do they use to get a tan?
Palm oil.
How the tree introduce themselves to the dentist?
“Implant”
This rainbow is on its last legs, it's really hanging by a red.
What do you call a storm that doesn't come to fruition?
A mist opportunity!
What is the difference between a chemist and a geologist? While a geologist will drink anything fermented, a chemist just
drinks anything that is distilled.
Pink is the early bird of the rainbow colors, it's always the first to rose and shine.
Went camping last night. It was in-tents.
If you are preparing jacket potatoes, your choice vegetables should be button mushrooms.
My grand father always said "fight Fire with Fire".
He was a great man but a terrible Fireman
The reason why mushrooms are always welcome even in high-end parties is because everybody believes they are really fun-guys.
I had a rainbow for lunch. I'm trying to eat light.
What is it called when a snowman has a temper tantrum?
A meltdown!
What is the color of the wind? Blew!
The stormy weather affected my ability to remember my alphabets. I remember A, B, C, D, and F but I misty.Someone got hurt from a fistful of grass thrown at them with force. When they pressed charges, the cops charged the culprit with physical grass-ault.
What did the man say after he slipped and fell on the ice?
Nothing, he just gave everyone the cold shoulder.
Iron Man's favourite Xmas gifts this year were socks that fire from his feet.
He called them missile toes.
Why should you never expect perfection from geologists?
Because they all have their faults.
Where do the mushroom family keep their umbrellas, coats and shoes? In their porch-ini!
Why did the ocean break up with the pond?
She thought he was too shallow.
What is a tornado's favorite movie? Gone With the Wind!
Why do trees always get hired? They have the right qual-leaf-ications.
Did you hear about the scientist who was lab partners with a pot of boiling water?
He had a very esteemed colleague.
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