When is Monday coming?
MonSoon!
What does a flower write on their valentine?
Aloe you vera much.
During a family discussion, my father said that grass is not greener than other plants. No one should make a biased grass-umption like that.
What's all wet and likes to shake? It's an earthquake on a rainy day.
When is a piece of wood made king? when its a ruler
Q: What do you call a row of 10 blondes standing ear to ear?
A: A wind tunnel.
What do you call a periodic table when the gold is missing? Au revoir.
It's ok to be negative if you find yourself in a thunderstorm.
You probably won't get struck by lightning.
What do you call a Grizzly at a nude beach?
Bear Naked.
What do you call the least popular color in the rainbow? The weakest pink.
Why do sailors eat shellfish when rain is forecast?
It’s the clam before the storm.
I'm trying to break the ice, but you just keep giving me the cold shoulder.
Why did the lobster blush?
Because the sea weed.
What tree is bought the most at the plant store?
The poplar tree
How do you know flowers are capable of kissing?
They have tulips.
Why was the Blonde fired from the M&M factory?
She kept throwing away the W's.
Why is the ocean always blue?
Because the shore never waves back.
A man went to the gym today and met up with his new personal rainer.
What did the husband say when his wife told him he bought the wrong flowers?
"Oopsie daisy!"
Why didn’t the light rain hit the target?
It just mist.
Why do flowers always drive so fast?
They put the petal to the metal.
What do you say to a flower after a breakup?
Get clover it.
If I could change the periodic table, I would put Uranium and Iodine next to each other.
You can virtually stay in any room. The only one you can’t is the mush-room because it is reserved for fungi.
What did one tidepool say to the other tidepool?
Show me your mussels!
What is another king’s favorite type of precipitation?
Reign!
What do you call a martial arts expert in a tree?
Bruce Leaf.
What did the flower say after he told a joke?
I was just pollen your leg!
Lightning sometimes shocks people because it just doesn't know how to conduct itself.
What do you say when the beach asks you to walk on it?
Shore
Did you hear about the mother who gave birth to her baby while she was in the sky?
I guess you can say the baby was airborne
Over the years, my neighbour has buried his deceased pets in his backyard, and to his surprise, a plant has sprung up.
It's a Cemer Tree.
What do you call an old snowman?
Water.
What is it called when a tree has back problems?
ScoliOAKsis
That crazy little sun of a beach.
What plant do both Spaniards and French agree is the best?
Seaweed.
What’s every ice cream parlor owner’s side hustle?
Sundae school teacher.
My wife wanted to plant flowers
Problem is she hasn’t botany.
What time is it when little white flakes fall past the classroom window?
Snow and Tell.
Why was there lightning and thunder in the lab?
The scientists were brainstorming.
I have a butcher friend in London. Last week he caught a huge sea creature in the river there and made it into sausage. It was the beast of Thames. It was the wurst of Thames.
I fernly beleaf my tree puns are qualitree, you can leaf me alone if you disagreen.
What did the teaching tree do when it went overseas? It took a leaf of absence!
How much do you love rainbows? Just a skittle bit.
Q: Where can a tornado be jailed?
A: In a high pressure cell.
. How can you easily identify a dogwood tree? By listening to the bark.
What do you call an amazing day up a mountain? A peak experience.
Life's a beach. Enjoy the waves.
How the tree introduce themselves to the dentist?
“Implant”
What do you call a negative fog?
A pessimist.
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