My boss told me that he was going to fire the person with the worst posture
I have a hunch, it might be me.
There are so much beautiful sceneries near the river valleys. They are totally gorges.
I heard there are some fires near Greece
We’re gonna need a lot of baking soda.
What do you call it when two people make a baby in fog?
A mist conception.
What type of baseball player gives out all the water?
The Pitcher.
Why did the river refuse to join the sea? Because the sea was salty.
During the contribution’s session, the mushroom family never gave a lot. They were just two spore.
I couldn't figure out why that ball in the sky kept getting bigger...
Then it hit me.
Why do freshwater fish cry so much?
They’re just a stream of emotions.
I went fishing in the ocean the other day and caught one fish
but I think it was just a fluke.
My dad's nickname is lightning.
That way I can tell my friends I've been struck by lightning multiple times.
What do you call a martial arts expert in a tree?
Bruce Leaf.
What is known as the world's wettest animal? Rain-deer.
Why did the strangers walk out onto the frozen pond?
Why are seabirds so lucky in love?
Because one good tern always deserves another.
What is a mountains favorite type of candy?
Snow caps.
If you are preparing jacket potatoes, your choice vegetables should be button mushrooms.
I'm trying to break the ice, but you just keep giving me the cold shoulder.
What pickup line did the flower use on Tinder?
Are you a DAMNdelion?
What did Snoop Dog need to get an umbrella?
Fo’ Drizzle.
What happens to romantic trees on Valentine’s Day? They get all sappy.
I enjoy the cold weather
But only to a certain degree.
What does a queen want on her cookie?
Royal Icing.
I’m going to start a YouTube channel where I critique bottled water...
It’s an untapped market.
I'm reading a book called "The Yellow River"
It's written by I.P. Freely
A storm blew away 25% of my roof last night....
..... oof !!
What’s a flower’s favorite band?
Guns n’ Roses.
What do you call a friendly volcano? Lava-ble.
Why Did the Whale Cross the Ocean?
To get to the other tide.
This rock was magma before it was cool.
Get it?
I'm saving for a rainy day, so far I've collected a couple of raincoats, an anorak, and a dinghy.
What do you call a nice tree that does not have any teeth? Sweetgums.
You should dress up warm in the Andes. That place is Chile.
Son: “Hey Dad, can we go to the beach?”
Dad: “Shore?”
Why did the tectonic plates break up? It wasn’t her fault, but there was just too much friction between them.
What did the lightning say to the fireworks?
"Hey! You stole my thunder."
Why aren’t trees competitive sports fans? They like to root for everyone.
Why don’t Native Americans like to do rain dances in April anymore?
Because April showers bring Mayflowers.
What did the flower say after he told a joke?
I was just pollen your leg!
Today isn’t the day to be making jokes about the weather.
It’s snow joke.
What do you call a dinosaur that got stuck in the rain?
A driplodocus.
What does the birch like to study in school? Chemistree.
My parents always told me I can be anything I wanted, the sky's the limit
This made me sad because I wanted to be an astronaut.
What do pines eat for breakfast? Past-trees.
What sort of cakes do snowmen like?
The ones with thick icing!
It was so hot that the bee's perm had become extremely unmanageable, so she turned into a frizzbee.
What do you call an indoor plant?
An intro-vert
I don't know if I just got hit by freezing rain, but it hurt like hail.
Lightning sometimes shocks people because it just doesn't know how to conduct itself.
What do you call a ghoul who sits too close to the fire?
A toasty ghosty.
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