What does a flower therapist ask her patients?
Are you feeling bouquet?
When a mountain falls sick, it tells the doctor that he's feeling really very, very hill.
What is an evil dictator’s favorite type of weather?
A rain of terror.
I knew a guy that got struck by lightning twice.
It was a re-volting scene.
What do you call it when you plant a tree at each corner of a house?
A fourest.
Four types of weather were having a race. Sunny won gold, cloudy got silver, snowy picked up a bronze, and rainy won a precipitation award.
Why is the world so diverse?
Because it contains alkynes of people.
What did one ocean say to another?
Nothing, it just waved.
Why was the dogwood always making bad choices? Because he kept barking up the wrong tree.
The ocean made me salty.
What do you call a month’s worth of rain?
England.
I got fired from the Calendar Factory yesterday
They say it's because I took a day off.
What do you call a guy in a wheelchair who keeps getting struck by lightning?
A handicapacitor.
Did you hear about those really bad storms that hit that boy scout camp over night?
They were in tents.
Why don’t Native Americans like to do rain dances in April anymore?
Because April showers bring Mayflowers.
What do you call a can of soda in a conglomerate? Coca-Cola Clastic.
When Mr. Mushroom saw Miss Mushroom, he didn’t hesitate to ask her out on a date because he had she was such a fungi-rl.
The fisherman lost his new fishing hook in the river. He refused to accept it. He was in the Nile.
What does Santa often say to Mrs Claus? Come and look at the rain-dear.
What do you call a boy swimming at the beach?
Buoyancy.
A tree's limbs fell off in a storm, now it's an amputree.
What do you call it when you get a month’s worth of rain at once?
England.
What do plants and homies have in common?
I love watching them grow.
You should dress up warm in the Andes. That place is Chile.
You can’t predict wind speeds with certainty. The best you can do is make a gust-imate.
My neighbour always thinks he knows more about the weather than me
The guy is a real snow it all.
Had a great weekend. Won the annual weather forecaster's championships!
I beat the raining champion.
I was thinking about using a mushroom to poison someone. My morel stopped me.
What do you call a wet teddy bear?
A drizzly bear.
eople say they never get hungry at the beach
That’s because there’s sand, which is everywhere.
What’s the scariest plant?
BamBoo.
My boss fired me.
"Why?" I asked.
He said, "You always question authority."
"How?"
The ocean cut off all ties with the river, because the river turned out to be too shallow.
What book of the bible do you read on a beach?
The book of psalms trees.
What did the monochrome say to the rainbow?
Oh no! My arch nemesis!
Even during thunderstorms, Santa can still deliver presents because raindeers fly his sleigh.
What did the mushroom say after the car accident? Help I’m a truffle!
Where does seaweed look for a job?
In the kelp-wanted section.
Why are geologists great dates?
They can make your bedrock.
My friends were talking about what different colours grass they preferred.
I told them they were being gracist.
Two fish were swimming in a stream when it began to rain.
One fish said, “Quick, let’s swim under that bridge, otherwise we will get wet!”
Why was the pine tree always in trouble? It kept being knotty.
Why did the worm cross the ruler?
To become an inchworm
You have to act quickly during a flood because it's an emergent sea.
A young boy and his dad laid on the grass, looking at the sky. The boy asked, "Dad, will you teach me about the sky?"
The dad replied, "Son, it's way over your head."
Son: “Hey Dad, can we go to the beach?”
Dad: “Shore?”
If trees could kill you, they wood.
If you drop your white shirt in the Red Sea, what will it become?
Wet
I lost my cat in a snowstorm!
But he should be fine because he's a cool cat.
I was going to try putting a mushroom into my cola. I wanted to be a my cola gist.
Go to BabaMail
