What did the Ocean say to the shore?
Nothing. It just waved.
What is the name of the car that passes through the narrow stream of the river? Fjord.
Why is the ocean always on time?
She likes to stay current.
Why do earth science professors always talk about ammonia? Because it’s basic material.
Why did the River go to the doctor? Her flow wouldn't stop.
I installed a sky light in my apartment.
The people upstairs were not happy at all.
There was a television channel ran by pets, the weather forecast was on and inclement weather was being predicted...
High chance of it raining cats and dogs, howling winds, and a possible purricane.
Q: How do clouds keep in touch with each other?
A: Using sky-pe.
What did the bride say to her new husband at their wedding? - I love you so mush-groom!
What looks like half a pine tree? The other half.
What do you call a tree with no tinsel, baubles, or topping?
A tree.
What did one blade of grass say to another about the lack of rain?
I guess we'll just have to make dew.
A team of mushrooms was playing basketball against a team of cabbages. The mushrooms won. Everyone cheered for the champignons.
Today a large tree suddenly fell over right in front of me.
I was stumped.
Shell yeah.
Did you know the Mississippi River is a girl?
If it was a guy it would be the misterssippi River.
It’s raining cats and dogs outside.
I think I just stepped in a poodle.
Why are trees such great drivers? They always take the shortest root.
I enjoy throwing coins in the river and watching them. I like studying my cash flow.
What does a door to door flower salesman do?
Petal his wares.
What did the ghost knights say to the cloud king?
Our souls will rain forever.
I fernly beleaf my tree puns are qualitree, you can leaf me alone if you disagreen.
Why did the banana tree have to make a doctor’s appointment during the hurricane? Her fruit was peeling under the weather.
I heard there are some fires near Greece
We’re gonna need a lot of baking soda.
What is a mountains favorite type of candy?
Snow caps.
My grand father always said "fight Fire with Fire".
He was a great man but a terrible Fireman
How does a Snowman get to work?
By icicle.
Two fish are swimming in a river, when one of them hits a concrete wall. He turns to the other and says: "Dam"
Where do saplings go to learn?
Elementree school
What is the ocean’s favorite lullaby?
Roe, Roe, Roe Your Boat.
Guess what I do when my ice house falls apart.
Igloo it back together!
The police officer went to the crime scene and he saw that there had been a murder in the dense grasslands. Guess, we could call it a grass-assination.
How do you cut the sea in half? With a see saw!
What do you call a month’s worth of rain?
England.
I would love climbing to the peak of Mount Everest, but I do not see the point.
Getting my toy drone stuck in the tree isn’t the worst thing that happened to me today.
But it’s definitely up there.
What do you call a storm that's raining cats and dogs?
A furricane
Did you hear about the red ship that collided with the blue ship?
All the sailors were marooned.
What is a flower’s favorite Journey song?
Don’t stop be-leafing.
What do you call a human that's now a cactus?
A transplant.
I read a bunch of news articles dealing with lightning strikes recently.
I'm trying to keep myself knowledgeable about current events.
What did the rainwater say as it ran off the road.
Grate.
A guy just walked into my store and bought a bunch of fog machines so I called the cops.
He must belong to an extreme mist organization.
What is the the chemical formulation for candy molecules? Carbon, Holmium, Cobalt, Lanthanum, Tellerium—or ChoCoLaTe.
Why can’t minerals ever lie? They’re always in their pure form.
What do you call a slow skier?
A slopepoke!
You want to hear the best rock puns? Give me a moment and I’ll dig something up.
What do you call a rock that never goes to school?
A skipping stone!
I went to a restaurant and had a salad. Afterward, I got an intense pain in my stomach. I visited the doctor and he told me that I had grass-troentiritis.
Why are dogwood trees amazing pets? They have a great bark and a wooden bite.
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