Why are trees a popular Christmas decoration? They look good in boughs.
What did one body of water say to the other?
"Do you sea what I sea?"
H20 is water, but what is H204?
It’s for swimming and drinking, of course.
A woman who gave birth in a tree was sent to jail
She was charged with treeson
Why didn’t the flower get a second date?
He was garden variety.
What happens when you blend sulfur, tungsten and silver together? SWAG.
It was pretty foggy outside today.
I shot an arrow in the air, and it stuck.
Why was fog kicked off the football team? He mist a field goal.
The only way the mushroom could think of decorating his house was with toadstools.
Why is it impossible to have a balanced conversation with a female mushroom? - Because shiitake too much!
What do you call a gestalt consciousness of plants?
A chive mind.
When the storm begun, the garden party became a bit disorganized and food service was turned to a frost come frost served.
How did the pines and firs end their war? With a tree-ty.
Q: What do you call a row of 10 blondes standing ear to ear?
A: A wind tunnel.
Why do trees always hold grudges? Because they never fir-get.
My dad's nickname is lightning.
That way I can tell my friends I've been struck by lightning multiple times.
What can you do if you are the ocean?
Watever you want.
What do you call a chicken that was struck by lightning?
Air fried.
What type of motorcycle do London Plane trees like to ride? Treeumph.
Today isn’t the day to be making jokes about the weather.
It’s snow joke.
Why was there lightning and thunder in the lab?
The scientists were brainstorming.
R.I.P boiled water. You will be mist
Q: What is a tornado’s favorite game?
A: Twister
Rivers are so lazy they never get out of their beds.
What did the water in the fire truck say when it came to a sudden stop?
I'm baffled.
How do blondes define hydrophobic on their school tests? A fear of utility bills.
What do you call a tooth in a glass full of water?
A one molar solution.
What do you call a can of soda in a conglomerate? Coca-Cola Clastic.
Everyone said the wind was powerful. So, I went outside and was blown away.
What do you call it when you boil a water buffalo?
A mist steak.
Did you hear about the scientist who was lab partners with a pot of boiling water?
He had a very esteemed colleague.
They told me they were handing out free beef at the beach...
When I arrived I realized it was a bay-con.
What did one raindrop say to the other? Two's company, three's a cloud.
What do you call a boy swimming at the beach?
Buoyancy.
What does a spy do in the rain?
He goes undercover.
During the contribution’s session, the mushroom family never gave a lot. They were just two spore.
What did the storm drain say when it learnt it'd be getting a new cover?
That's just grate.
I recently got offered a job studying fog but I turned it down.
Looking back, I now think it was a mist opportunity.
Seas the day.
What did the flower say to his wife when he brought her home a present?
I hope thistle cheer you up.
You should dress up warm in the Andes. That place is Chile.
How do cows intake water?
by Osmoosis.
Why did Frosty the snowman want a divorce?
Because he thought his wife was a flake.
While rainbows must be many colors, they should always stay blue to themselves.
What plant do both Spaniards and French agree is the best?
Seaweed.
Why do trees have to drink responsibly? Otherwise, they become a bunch of trunk idiots.
What can you catch in the winter with your eyes closed?
A cold.
Have you heard about the street performer who does his act in the middle of a storm?
It's mime blowing.
Why did the mushroom need time off work? Because he was fried.
What do chic evergreens wear for cruelty-free fashion? Faux fir.
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