You can tell an ant’s gender by putting it in the water.
If it sinks, it’s a girl. If it floats, it’s a buoyant.
Why are oceans so meticulous?
They like to be pacific.
Why did the ocean break up with the pond?
She thought he was too shallow.
What do you call a wet teddy bear?
A drizzly bear.
What is the king’s favorite type of precipitation?
Hail, of course!
Did you hear about the ocean and sea having a baby?
It was a buoy!
What did the sink say to the water faucet?
You’re a real drip.
Why did the Clydesdale give the pony a glass of water?
Because he was a little horse!
I was so disappointed when I went to the court house themed restaurant and all they gave me was frozen water.
Justice was served.
What's a flowing water with living organisms called?
A livestream.
If Smart water were actually smart…
Then why did it get bottled?
Does a water bed become bouncier when you fill it up with spring water?
What is the ocean’s favorite lullaby?
Roe, Roe, Roe Your Boat.
Why does the river never get lost?
She always finds the right pathwave.
It's really easy to learn white water kayaking
You just go with the flow.
My friend couldn't afford to pay his water bill.
So I sent him a “get well soon” card.
RIP boiled water.
You will be mist.
RIP to Boiled Water.
You will be sorely mist.
Why do poets always write about the sea?
They just can’t fathom her depths.
How do you make holy water?
By boiling the hell out of it.
Why do sharks only swim in salt water?
Because pepper always makes them sneeze.
How do you know if an ant is a boy or a girl?
If you toss it in the water and it sinks, it’s a girl. If the ant floats, it’s a buoyant.
Where do doubtful Egyptians get their water from?
Denial River.
What do you call it when a guy throws his laptop into the ocean?
Adele, Rollin’ in the Deep.
What do you call two days of rain in a row in Seattle?
The weekend.
The weatherman said it might get a bit drizzly outside.
You can expect a Lil’ Wayne.
What do you call it when it rains ducks and geese?
Fowl weather.
What did one water bottle ask the other water bottle?
Water you doing today?
My friend couldn’t pay his water bill anymore.
I sent him a Get Well Soon card.
How did the raindrop ask another raindrop on a date?
He asked her “Water you doing tonight?”
Where do water droplets go to settle arguments?
The Supreme Quart.
There are two reasons why you should never drink toilet water.
Number one. And number two.
How do you make holy water?
Make sure to boil the hell out of it.
If a hole isn't full of water then it isn't feeling well
Which weighs less; butane, gasoline or water?
Butane, because it's lighter fluid.
Why don’t you see an ocean in school?
They just can’t wade through all that homework.
Why was the man using ketchup during the rain?
Someone said it was raining cats and hot dogs.
Why is the ocean always on time?
She likes to stay current.
Why couldn’t the fish watch YouTube?
He couldn’t stream the video.
What do you call a tooth in a glass full of water?
A one molar solution.
What type of baseball player gives out all the water?
The Pitcher.
H20 is water, but what is H204?
It’s for swimming and drinking, of course.
HIJKLMNO is the formula for water
H to O.
How do cows intake water?
by Osmoosis.
What did one body of water say to the other?
"Do you sea what I sea?"
A parishioner at my church broke into the holy water tank and splashed some on his infant daughter, saying, "your are hereby baptized!"
That's just not rite.
What is worse than when it is raining buckets?
Hailing taxis.
Where do meteorologists like to drink after work?
The closest ISOBAR.
How do the Skywalkers like their bath water?
Luke-warm.
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