Why couldn't the garden gnome run in the marathon?
Because he's not part of the human race!
The goal nine yards
Which superstar has a nose for the puck? Mario the Magsniffascent.
Why do referees always hurry to catch their next flight? Because it's "two
minutes 'fore boarding!"
Who's got a penchant for spearing? Pronger!
[Water Slide] I was going to get some work done, but I decided to let it slide.
What do skiers get if they sit in the snow for too long?
Polaroids!
We’ll have a ball.
What do you call a basketball team that cries after they lose the game?
A bawl club.
Even if injuries end it prematurely, Paul's had a good Kariya.
This is one spray-cation to remember.
Is your nickname cream cheese? Because you’re about to get bageled.
What is the difference between a fish and a piano? You can't tuna fish.
Which basketball team is the favorite at the North Pole?
The New York Old Saint Knicks.
There is no glory in practice, but without practice there can be no glory. This volleyball pun is very inspirational. For you to do your best, you have to be willing to practice.
They say that volleyball is just mind over matter. Because in our minds, you don’t matter.
We’ll kickoff the party with some cocktails.
Today I donated my old basketball hoop to a school for the blind.
It will be missed.
But would they be stoned by the goalie?
No, they'd smoke it right between the pipes!
What happened when the football coach’s dog ran onto the field during a game?
He got called for ineligible retriever down field!
The basketball player sat on the sideline and began sketching pictures of chickens. He was learning how to draw fowls.
I just watched Sunday Night Football.
There were Lutz and Lutz of field goals.
Did you hear about the volleyball players who are getting married? They say it was love at first spike.
Fred is so condescending about my tennis strokes. I can’t take any more of his backhanded compliments.
What do baseball players eat their backyard BBQ on?
Home plates.
The huddle is real
Why did the fish cross the road? Cause it was hooked!
I used to hate tennis, but ever since I’ve started winning 6-0, I love it now.
Kicking off the afternoon in the best way possible
What did the skiier say when his standup act was going downhill fast?
There snow possible way these puns could be more painful.
We like rough sets. As long as you practice safe sets, there isn’t a problem.
Why did the volleyball player have ropes and shoe strings? They wanted to tie the score.
What has 18 legs, spits a lot, and catches flies?
A baseball team.
The coddled superstar sat in the seats with the fans instead of on the bench
with the team; for this, ironically enough, he was accused of grandstanding!
What does a volleyball player do when they go to prom? They spike the punch.
Why did the blonde skier cut a hole near the top of her boyfriend's ski parka?
She wanted to give him the cold shoulder.
Jack has a large neck so he decided to wear a bowtie to his wedding. Otherwise, he’d end up with a tiebreak.
Where can you find the biggest diamond in the world?
On a baseball field.
Pack your trunks – we’re having a pool party!
Whatever you do this summer, be sure to make a splash.
A baseball walks into a bar. The bartender throws him out.
For instant fun, just add water.
Why was the baseball player so good at writing advertising jingles?
Because they're so catchy.
Why’s it always hot after a football game?
All the fans left.
You can never get short balls over the net! Solution: Drop shot from arsenal.
What do you call a woman standing in the middle of a tennis court?
Anette.
The density of this concrete leads me to believe one thing: it is a hard court.
When you go with an army general onto a bowling alley, he will start bowling even before you enter his name on the scoreboard.
Why don't orphans play baseball? They don't know where home is
Bowlers pay a lot of money to play. This is because it is a bum per lane.
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