Why was the Copper Mountain skier taken to the emergency room?
He hurt his ski bum.
I saw the chicken quickly crossing the basketball court? Then I remembered that the referee was blowing fowls.
Who was the fastest runner of all time?
Adam. He was the first in the human race.
The refs kept calling interference, even though goalmouth incidents were in
de-crease.
If volleyball were easy, they would call it football.
What do you get if you cross a ski instructor and a vampire?
Frostbite.
What's the greatest problem facing Poland?
The four-ten split.
How does a volleyball team welcome their new neighbors? With a block party.
What do sprinters eat before a race?
Nothing, they fast.
I can’t believe I framed the ball in for a winner. Shank you!
The classiest indoor tennis facilities serve bubble tea.
Which front-office type is the most promiscuous? The general ménageur.
Cold Ski Pun of the Day: I'm tired of slalom skiing. Alpine over another telemark now.
Chairlift Pick-Up Line: Hey baby, is it really windy up here, or are you just blowing me away?
Do you know how to dunk cookies? Ask a basketball chef.
Do baseball players ever wear armor?
Only during knight games.
Which Habs great once worked as a janitor? Broom-Broom Geoffrion.
Opposing coaches facing the Leafs in the 60s and 70s knew that Dave was the
one to Keon.
How do snowboarders introduce themselves when they meet somebody on the slopes?
Sorry Dude.
[Bundled Up Guy] This is what you call man coverage.
Why did the football coach attempt to destroy the vending machine?
Cuz it wouldn't give him his quarterback.
It feels great to hit the ball again. It spin a long time.
What do you call a Sith Lord who likes to go fishing? Darth Wader.
What is the first time that a volleyball match was talked about in the Bible? When Joseph served in the Pharaoh’s court.
My friend Elmer’s has gotten really good at tennis ever since he stuck to a healthier diet and went glue-ten free.
Why did the blonde run backward?
She wanted to gain weight.
When is an MLB ballpark the hottest?
After all the fans have left.
Have you ever played quiet tennis?
It's just like regular tennis but without the racket.
Why do benched players always seem to look so wise? They don’t have to look like fools on the floor and entertain the crowds.
What is the 7th pin in bowling called? Mother-In-Law!
The perfect name for a pig that plays basketball is a ball hog.
What did the football player say to the flight attendant?
"Put me in coach."
Where can you find the biggest diamond in the world?
On a baseball field.
How do baseball players stay in contact with each other?
They touch base every once in a while.
Why are street thugs so good at basketball?
Because they know how to shoot, steal, and run.
Grasshoppers do not fancy soccer matches because most of them prefer cricket matches.
What do you call a guy who can't stop running along the beach?
Joggernaut.
What sport does the Koolaid man play?
Baseball. He's a pitcher.
Which position does the son of Dracula play on the baseball team?
Bat boy.
The best place on earth to shop for soccer kits is New Jersey.
Did I tell you about my new girlfriend who also plays football?
Yeah.. she‘s a keeper
Scuba diving is a good hobby... if you wanna hit rock bottom.
Which superstar has a nose for the puck? Mario the Magsniffascent.
What do you call a very slow skier?
A slope-poke.
I made a snap decision to watch football today
What type of noodles do swimmers like best?
Pool noodles!
For instant fun, just add water.
I got so mad at my partner hitting moonballs, I had to pusher off the court.
What do you call a diving dog?
A sub woofer.
Two tomatoes went jogging. One trips and falls. The other tomato said, "Grab my Heinz and I'll help you up." Trippy tomato replies, "Nah, you go ahead. I'll ketchup."
Pardon me if I’m being pool-itically incorrect.
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