What does the pope eat during lent? Holy mackerel!
Grasshoppers do not fancy soccer matches because most of them prefer cricket matches.
Why did they arrest the volleyball player? They suspected foul play.
What trophy does a stay-at-home defencemen win? The Snorris!
Opposing coaches facing the Leafs in the 60s and 70s knew that Dave was the
one to Keon.
How are a volleyball player and a carpenter similar? They both love to hammer spikes.
If you do bowling and for some reason you can’t hear a pin drop, something could be wrong with your bowling.
We’ll kickoff the party with some cocktails.
Footballers love one specific type of tea; penal-tea.
There is no glory in practice, but without practice there can be no glory. This volleyball pun is very inspirational. For you to do your best, you have to be willing to practice.
We had an argument on our way back from the tournament. Our position is that their goal was stopping ours.
Water you doing on [date]?
[Pool Noodle] That’s using your noodle!
Everyone is getting so paranoid, and diving into conspiracy theories lately...
Must be something in the water.
This summer is going swimmingly.
Why don't skeletons ski the black diamond runs at Copper Mountain?
They've got soul, but they just don't have the heart for it.
I'm currently dating a famous soccer player. He's so loving and caring towards me.
He's a keeper.
A knife tried out for Varsity football.
It didn't make the cut.
What do you call the basketball move where you drink too much alcohol and score?
SlamDrunk!
[Chicken] We’re serving this during the game, so you might call it a live ball fowl.
I can’t believe I framed the ball in for a winner. Shank you!
Why couldn't the garden gnome run in the marathon?
Because he's not part of the human race!
You shouldn't wear glasses when playing football...
They say it's a contact sport.
What do police officers do when they are on the volleyball court? They serve and protect.
The dog didn’t want to play soccer because it was a boxer.
Did you hear that Notre Dame gave up four interceptions last week?
Knute Rockne would turnover in his grave!
I used to hate tennis, but ever since I’ve started winning 6-0, I love it now.
Why was the baseball player so good at writing advertising jingles?
Because they're so catchy.
What is a bird that flies over a football field called?
A fieldgull.
Why wasn't the jogger all that bummed out when his girlfriend broke up with him?
'Cause they had a good run.
Why are volleyball players always so blameless? They always pass the blame and try to avoid faults.
Why did the blonde skier cut a hole near the top of her boyfriend's ski parka?
She wanted to give him the cold shoulder.
What game do some skiers like to play on the road trip to the slopes?
Ice Spy With My Little Ice.
The only ship that has never docked on their harbor is the premiership.
Good bowlers always keep their minds out of the gutter.
If you want to impress the crowd, hit overheads. Every point will be a smash hit.
Having a ball this weekend with my best friends
Why did the blonde skier only wear one boot?
Channel 7's weatherman said there was a 50% chance of snow.
Why do so few vegetarians become competitive swimmers?
They don’t like the swim meats!
They say I’m too indecisive to be a tennis umpire
but I still haven’t ruled it out.
What type of films should players watch to improve their shot? Slap stick.
The crowd had filled up the venue and everyone was waiting for the bowling alley to open. Finally, they got the ball rolling.
This is one spray-cation to remember.
If you want a loyal marriage, get hitched to a basketball player. He will never pass you, rather he will keep you all to himself.
Did you hear about the fumbled exorcism? The guy retained possession!
What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball?
Juan on Juan.
What is a cyclops' favorite winter activity?
Sking. That's like skiing, but only with one eye.
Have you ever played quiet tennis?
It's just like regular tennis but without the racket.
Today I donated my old basketball hoop to a school for the blind.
It will be missed.
Where do point guards take their dates to party after the game?
To a basket ball.
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