Ed Belfour's new contract offer isn't high compared to other goal tenders.
What do skiers order at fast food restaurants?
Icebergers with Chilly Sauce, on the slide.
What is a bird that flies over a football field called?
A fieldgull.
I like your tight end
Why did the volleyball player join the marines? To serve our country.
Oh, I thought I was playing the first round, but I guess I got a free pass. Bye.
What does a volleyball player do when they go to prom? They spike the punch.
What do you get when you run behind a car?
Exhausted!
Jokes are a lot like American football.
If you haven't gotten anywhere with the first three tries, you'll need to rely on your punner.
What's the difference between a high-hit baseball and a maggot's father?
One is a pop fly and the other is a fly pop.
I started watching soccer because I could see it’s very relevant to my life.
Little to no goals.
A guy walks into the bar.
It's hardly surprising he didn't make the steeplechase team, on reflection.
My girlfriend told me she's breaking up with me because of my football obsession.
I told her she'll need to wait till the summer window if she wants a free transfer.
What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball?
Juan on Juan.
I hate when I have to stop scuba diving
If makes me deep-pressed
But would they be stoned by the goalie?
No, they'd smoke it right between the pipes!
Set or be set. This is certainly the right way to look at things.
I saw the chicken quickly crossing the basketball court? Then I remembered that the referee was blowing fowls.
Where do Danish players aim with the puck? Top kroner.
What do runners eat before a big race?
Fast food.
What does a basketball player say when he misses?
Shoot!
Do you know why an octopus is so good at Football?
It gets ten tackles a play.
Which commandment do baseball players hate the most? Thou shall not steal.
Why was the baseball player so good at writing advertising jingles?
Because they're so catchy.
Why did the volleyball player have ropes and shoe strings? They wanted to tie the score.
Where do fish sleep? In a river bed
In a conversation between one pin and another, one said, “Let us never split.”
Where do players hide their marijuana?
Between the stash marks.
I made a snap decision to watch football today.
Basketball players at times get athletes foot. Come to think of it, it is like the missle toe astronauts get.
I like big punts and I cannot lie
What do the guys at the ski repair shop eat their lunch on?
Baseplates.
The best place on earth to shop for soccer kits is New Jersey.
Ski Area Pick-Up Line: Hey baby, do you believe in love at first sight, or should I go around this chairlift again?
Which Finn is like a hotdog on the ice? Teemu Salami.
What’s a Movers favorite football team?
The Packers!
Most of your players never make it out of the lower-level tournaments. I highly doubt their Futures as a professional.
Why are football players not allowed in bowling alleys?
After getting a strike, they spike the ball.
What does the ski bum do when the chairlift line is too long?
He's gondola top of the mountain.
Which is the coolest football team in Italy?
AC Milan.
[Water Slide] I was going to get some work done, but I decided to let it slide.
This pool is impressive. Or should I say swim-pressive?
What country do marathoners retire to?
Iran.
A hippie when his opponent disputes his calls: That’s pretty far-out, man!
Where do football players go shopping in the offseason? The tackle shop.
Why did the horny duck circle the baseball field?
She hoped to catch some fowl balls.
Why is it annoying to eat next to basketball players?
They dribble all the time.
Do you want to know what you get when you cross a newborn snake with a basketball? Really! Ooh you will end up with a bouncing baby boa.
Why are fisherman so stingy?
Their jobs make them sel-fish!
Did you hear the terrible rumor about the volleyball player? That’s what she set!
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