Have you ever played quiet tennis?
It's just like regular tennis but without the racket.
They say that volleyball is just mind over matter. Because in our minds, you don’t matter.
Why do hitters find it so hard to be productive when they are indoors? They always work on an angle to play outside.
I can’t believe I framed the ball in for a winner. Shank you!
What do the guys at the ski repair shop eat their lunch on?
Baseplates.
Some call them opponents. We call them victims. It sounds like you have the right mindset to succeed on the court!
What do you say when your dad wears a speedo to the pool?
Spee-don’t!
What do you call a diving dog?
A sub woofer.
What game do some skiers like to play on the road trip to the slopes?
Ice Spy With My Little Ice.
Where do baseball players wash up?
In the bat tub.
Football pitches are almost always so wet. This is because soccer players dribble a lot.
I used to make extra money by selling illegal tennis equipment on the side, but I was approached by some thugs who told me to stop.
I guess they control the Tennis Racket around here.
There is a commonality between a thanksgiving and a bowler guest. They both love turkey.
How are ladies' baseball teams and cupcakes alike?
Both are delicious and depend on a good batter.
How do you communicate with a fish? Drop it a line!
Did you hear about the Heisman Trophy candidate who falsified his rushing stats?
The yards were stacked in his favor!
My girlfriend left me because all I do is talk about football.
I'm so sad, we were together for 3 seasons.
Why do the blondes prefer to have se* instead of bowling?
The balls are lighter, and you don't have to change shoes.
I’ve been getting blitzed all game
What do fish and women have in common? They both stop shaking their tale after you catch them!
The huddle is real
What is the 7th pin in bowling called? Mother-In-Law!
What did the bad soccer announcer get for Christmas?
COOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAALLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
The anti-vax basketball team lost every game this season
Apparently they never take any shots.
Which position does the son of Dracula play on the baseball team?
Bat boy.
Their soccer team and the US navy had one thing in common, they both spent over $50 million on a sub.
Why don't orphans play baseball? They don't know where home is
Why did the pirate captain want to hire a baseball player?
He knew he had a chest protector.
What it is it called if you refuse to go running today?
Resistance Training!
What is the worst advice a coach could ever give to a nude volleyball team? Play hard.
Oh buoy – we’re having a splash bash!
Why don't baseball players join unions?
They don't like to be called out on strike.
What did they call Dracula after his team won the big game?
The Champire.
Here’s the game plan: [party details]
With salsa, cheese dip, and guac, our bowl game is hot.
A guy walks into the bar.
It's hardly surprising he didn't make the steeplechase team, on reflection.
Why was the criminal dubbed the Beer Runner let go after being arrested for stealing 23 beers?
'Cause the prosecutors didn't have a case.
Why did the skier from Helsinki dominate the downhill slalom competition?
He led the race from start to Finnish.
Did you hear about the Owl that could play American football?
It was a superb_owl.
Why was McGruff the Crime Dog ejected from the football game?
He was called for unnecessary gruffness!
Why did the football coach attempt to destroy the vending machine?
Cuz it wouldn't give him his quarterback.
The game of golf is 90-percent mental…
And 10-percent mental.
The team’s star basketball player decided to remain at home the entire weekend. He didn’t want to be called out for travelling.
I went to Oxford University, where I was a philosophy major and the starting goalkeeper on the football team.
They called me Soccertes.
Which athlete wrote the book, Jumping for Exercize?
Lee Ping.
Give me some pigskin
Why was the mummy added to the game as a pinch hitter?
Because the manager knew he could wrap it up.
I like my matches like my tennis balls: Pressureless.
And yes, gnomes are always trying to get to first base with the ladies.
Golf is a lot like taxes:
You go for the green and wind up in the hole.
The football won’t be the only thing spiked at this party.
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