What do skiers order at fast food restaurants?
Icebergers with Chilly Sauce, on the slide.
Why shouldn't you hire a volleyball player to be your bartender?
The service may be excellent, but he'll try to spike all the drinks.
I'm currently dating a famous soccer player. He's so loving and caring towards me.
He's a keeper.
What did they give former Flyers left-winger Brian when he successfully
bulked up? Massive Propps.
What type of pool do mechanics like best?
The car pool!
I quit my job as a scuba diving instructor after my first day at work.
Deep down I realized it wasn’t for me.
What type of stroke does a classical musician use when swimming?
The Bach stroke!
If you make a mistake of playing basketball with pigs, they will hog the ball.
Join us for plenty of play action.
Which local sportswriters are most effusive? Those who work in the praise
box!
What type of noodles do swimmers like best?
Pool noodles!
What do you call a free treadmill?
The Great Outdoors.
How do volleyball players deliver their messages? Through Air Mail.
Why did the vampire strike out?
He used the wrong bat.
What do volleyball players like in bed? Kinky sets.
Is your eyesight as bad as your cell phone reception? Because that was a terrible call.
Why are fisherman so stingy?
Their jobs make them sel-fish!
Brother: "I saw a seahorse scuba diving"
Dad: "Wow that's amazing, I didn't realise they had the technology."
Why did the skier from Helsinki dominate the downhill slalom competition?
He led the race from start to Finnish.
A tennis ball walks into a bar.
The bar man asks: “have you been served?”
Why do hitters find it so hard to be productive when they are indoors? They always work on an angle to play outside.
I like big punts and I cannot lie
A team may be talented, but there is no substitute to this, no train no gain!
The density of this concrete leads me to believe one thing: it is a hard court.
Good bowlers always keep their minds out of the gutter.
What is the difference between a catfish and a lawyer? One is a bottom-dwelling, scum-sucking scavenger and the other is a fish!
My moment in the sun.
If you want to impress the crowd, hit overheads. Every point will be a smash hit.
What does Darth Vader say when he plays volleyball? May the spike be with you.
What do police officers do when they are on the volleyball court? They serve and protect.
Which cartoon character is the best at baseball?
Homer Simpson.
Which hulking left-winger could body-slam The Giant? Dave Andre-chuck.
My favorite sport is bowling cause I always strike out with girls.
What do you call a winged insect that hits home runs?
A fly swatter.
Why did the volleyball player cross the street? There was a team member bar tending who could serve spiked drinks.
Golfer: I’d move heaven and earth to break 100 on this course.
Caddie: Try heaven. You’ve already moved most of the earth.
What trophy does a stay-at-home defencemen win? The Snorris!
What’s the easiest shot in golf?
Your fourth putt.
Which position does the son of Dracula play on the baseball team?
Bat boy.
What is the difference between a fish and a piano? You can't tuna fish.
What did one hillbilly say to another? I got a new fly rod and reel for my wife. Best trade I ever made.
Did you hear about the rundown swimming pool?
It was a real dive!
The perfect description of a bowling game is one where there is plenty of room at the top, but no room to lie down.
Everybody wants to light up a soccer stadium. However, this is only possible using a soccer match.
I really hate these strings. I can feel it in my gut.
I hate scuba diving.
It was the lowest moment of my life.
I’m not a bad putter…
I just can’t catch a break.
What do you call a Sith Lord who likes to go fishing? Darth Wader.
Before they go out to a basketball game, all cheerleaders down several bottles of root beer.
What do the guys at the ski repair shop eat their lunch on?
Baseplates.
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