At the end of the year, there is always a rock n’ bowl concert where everyone gets entertained.
What does the ski bum do when the chairlift line is too long?
He's gondola top of the mountain.
"What are your thoughts on diving?"
"Well, I guess it's descent as a hobby."
Which baseball player makes the best pancakes?
The batter.
Why was the Copper Mountain skier taken to the emergency room?
He hurt his ski bum.
What do skiers get if they sit in the snow for too long?
Polaroids!
The anti-vax basketball team lost every game this season
Apparently they never take any shots.
What do you say when your dad wears a speedo to the pool?
Spee-don’t!
Why is Cinderella bad at football?
Because she’s always running away from the ball.
Why should you never go back in time to alter the outcome of a football game?
You’ll be called for past interference!
I’ve been getting blitzed all game.
Where do sperm play football?
In a con-dome.
A goal new ball game I he a kick outta you
Why are frogs great outfielders?
Because they never miss a fly.
Some call them opponents. We call them victims. It sounds like you have the right mindset to succeed on the court!
Do you believe this? All soccer players, irrespective of their country of origin, have one goal.
If there's a Tim Horton's chain, should there be a Lanny McDonald's? Or Doug
Harvey's? And what about Ron's Francise?
What country do marathoners retire to?
Iran.
My life-long rival just beat my record for deep-sea diving.
This is a new low.
They say that you can spike a volleyball. But you can never take away its dig-nity.
What do sprinters eat before a race?
Nothing, they fast.
What swims in the sea, carries a machine gun, and makes you an offer you can't refuse? The Codfather
Fred is so condescending about my tennis strokes. I can’t take any more of his backhanded compliments.
The only way athletes can stay cool even in a charged game is by standing near the fans.
What did they call Dracula after his team won the big game?
The Champire.
Did Cyclops the X-man play hockey? Yes, he enjoyed lasing up the skates.
Beauty is only pig skin deep
Ski Area Pick-Up Line: Hey baby, do you believe in love at first sight, or should I go around this chairlift again?
A spectator at a baseball game wondered why the ball kept getting bigger and bigger. Then, it hit him.
A baseball walks into a bar. The bartender throws him out.
The soccer player brought string to her game because she wanted to tie the score.
Ski Area Pick-Up Line: Hey baby, was it Red Bull that gave you wings, or are you just an angel?
When the going gets tough, let the pins fall where they may.
Which is the bar downtown that soccer players hate striking on? Crossbar.
Why did the fish cross the road? Cause it was hooked!
If you make a mistake of playing basketball with pigs, they will hog the ball.
Why couldn't the warden decide whether to allow the prison football team play the professional football team?
The idea had its pros and cons.
Give me some pigskin
Which superstar has a nose for the puck? Mario the Magsniffascent.
Why did the pirate captain want to hire a baseball player?
He knew he had a chest protector.
Is your eyesight as bad as your cell phone reception? Because that was a terrible call.
How are baseball umpires and angry chickens alike?
Both make fowl calls.
Why did the baseball batter go crazy?
Because the pitcher only threw scewballs.
What is a cyclops' favorite winter activity?
Sking. That's like skiing, but only with one eye.
Most of your players never make it out of the lower-level tournaments. I highly doubt their Futures as a professional.
Who directs all of the movies about volleyball injuries? Spike Lee.
The judge sentenced the basketball player to life imprisonment because he shot the ball.
What are a golfer’s favorite flowers?
Fore-get-me-nots.
What do you get if cross a baseball player and a monster?
A double header.
It is not uncommon for elephants to start a stampede. Especially if they want to play for the Chargers.
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