We’ll have a ball.
What type of pool do mechanics like best?
The car pool!
Why are some umpires fat?
Because they always clean the plate.
What did the skiier say when his standup act was going downhill fast?
There snow possible way these puns could be more painful.
Though it sounds mean, a bad soccer team is much like an old bra. It has no cups and minimal support.
Did you hear about the fumbled exorcism? The guy retained possession!
Beauty is only pig skin deep
You cannot strike it, if you don’t try it.
What did the mitt say to the baseball?
Hey baby, you're quite a catch.
Is your nickname cream cheese? Because you’re about to get bageled.
Setters do it better. This sounds like a good motto to put on a T-shirt.
[Chips] This is what I call a chip shot.
Where do players hide their marijuana?
Between the stash marks.
I really hate these strings. I can feel it in my gut.
A goal new ball game I he a kick outta you
Why do blind people hate diving?
It scares the hell out of their dogs.
Did you hear the terrible rumor about the volleyball player? That’s what she set!
A spectator at a baseball game wondered why the ball kept getting bigger and bigger. Then, it hit him.
Why are fisherman so stingy?
Their jobs make them sel-fish!
Having a ball
Why wasn't the jogger all that bummed out when his girlfriend broke up with him?
'Cause they had a good run.
Wife: I’m sick and tired of your obsession with golf!
Husband: Why, is it driving a wedge between us?
We had an argument on our way back from the tournament. Our position is that their goal was stopping ours.
What do we call the basketball team that won the donuts championships? – dunkin donuts.
What does a hunter do with a basketball?
He shoots it.
Why was the marathon runner plucked out of the race and taken away to jail?
For resisting a rest.
The only problem with golf is...
The slow groups are always in front of you and the fast groups are always behind you.
Which Finn is like a hotdog on the ice? Teemu Salami.
Do you know how to dunk cookies? Ask a basketball chef.
As a Brit, I can't get into American football
They rugby the wrong way.
Why did the volleyball player cross the street? There was a team member bar tending who could serve spiked drinks.
If you make a mistake of playing basketball with pigs, they will hog the ball.
What's the greatest problem facing Poland?
The four-ten split.
Both tournament directors published the schedule at the same time. It was a draw.
What does a bowler and a Thanksgiving guest have in common?
They both want a Turkey.
Why did the barber win the race?
He took a short cut!
What should you wear when you play against the National Volleyball Team? Football helmets.
Why didn’t the golfer get his homework done?
He wouldn’t stop puttering around.
Golf balls are like eggs…
They’re white, they are sold by the dozen, and a week later you have to buy more.
Why did the volleyball players line up from shortest to tallest? The coach wanted the team to switch from a 5-1 line up to a 6-2.
How did the blind guy from Denver enjoy a bit of apres skiing on Lookout Mountain during the last white-out?
He brought along his skiing-eye dog.
A knife tried out for Varsity football.
It didn't make the cut.
Poor white splash.
Hope you’re wide open on [date].
In a conversation between one pin and another, one said, “Let us never split.”
Why do benched players always seem to look so wise? They don’t have to look like fools on the floor and entertain the crowds.
Why was the potato fired from his job at the football stadium?
He was a horrible commentater.
What does the ski bum do when the chairlift line is too long?
He's gondola top of the mountain.
How does a volleyball team welcome their new neighbors? With a block party.
What did his wife give the guy when he came home all sweaty from his run?
The stink eye.
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