What do you call a benzene ring where the iron atoms replacing all of the carbon atoms? A ferrous wheel.
What happens when you blend sulfur, tungsten and silver together? SWAG.
Why are mountains not just funny? Because they are hilarious.
Have a gneiss day! This is one of the simplest rock puns, but it is certainly a gneiss way to start your day out right!
Why are geologists great dates?
They can make your bedrock.
Why is the world so diverse?
Because it contains alkynes of people.
Why did the tectonic plates break up?
It wasn’t her fault, but there was just too much friction between them.
What did the teenage rock say after failing its drive test? I don’t want to talc about it.
Why did the toddler chew on pebbles? He wanted to eat rock candy.
What do you call a can of pop found in a conglomerate?
Coca-Cola Clastic.
You want to hear the best rock puns? Give me a moment and I’ll dig something up.
This rock was magma before it was cool.
Get it?
Watson: Sherlock, what type of rock is this amazing specimen?
Holmes: It’s sedimentary, my dear Watson.
Does anyone remember the joke about the sodium deposits? Na.
Why was the sedimentary rock extra cheap?
Because it was on shale.
What type of weapon can you make with potassium, iron and nickel? A KniFe.
Why can’t minerals ever lie? They’re always in their pure form.
What do you call a can of soda in a conglomerate? Coca-Cola Clastic.
What do you call a periodic table when the gold is missing? Au revoir.
If H20 is water, then what is H204? It’s for drinking, washing and swimming, of course!
Why is the world so diverse? Because it contains alkynes of people.
Why was the sedimentary rock so cheap?
It was always on shale.
What did the metamorphic rock say during the test?
This is too much pressure!
When were rock puns the funniest?
During the stone age.
What did the rock say to the word processor?
Boulder.
What happens when you keep reading geology jokes in your free time? You know that you have really hit rock bottom.
Why do earth science professors always talk about ammonia? Because it’s basic material.
Did you hear about the metamorphosis professor who just gave up on life? He really needed a change.
Why should you never expect perfection from geologists?
Because they all have their faults.
What do you call a rock that never goes to school?
A skipping stone!
I really hate rock puns.
My sediments exactly.
What did the bartender say when he saw oxygen, hydrogen, sulfur, sodium and phosphorous enter his barroom? OH SnaP!
Rock was magma before it was cool.
You want to hear the best rock puns?
Give me a moment and I’ll dig something up.
What did the boy volcano say to the girl volcano? I really lava you!
What is black, purple, blue, yellow and white? Sugilite, sardonyx and opal all fighting over a gumball.
What type of fruit includes Barium and double Sodium? BaNaNa.
What did the gold say to the pyrite?
You’re a fool and a fake!
What do you call a rock that never goes to school? A skipping stone!
What is black, purple, blue, yellow and white?
Sugilite, sardonyx and opal all fighting over a gumball.
What do rocks eat?
Pom-a-granites.
Did you want to hear the joke about the mountain? Never mind, you would never get over it.
What do you call an Irish gem that’s a fake?
A sham rock.
What did the motivational speaker say?
Don’t take life for granite.
Why can’t minerals ever lie?
They’re always in their pure form.
What do you call a periodic table when the gold is missing?
Au revoir.
What is the the chemical formulation for candy molecules? Carbon, Holmium, Cobalt, Lanthanum, Tellerium—or ChoCoLaTe.
What kind of magazine does a rock like to read?
Rolling Stone.
What element comes from Norse mythology? Thorium.
What did the chemist cowboy tell his horse? HIO Ag!
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