This rock was magma before it was cool.
Get it?
Did you want to hear the joke about the mountain? Never mind, you would never get over it.
What did the boy volcano say to the girl volcano?
I really lava you!
If H20 is water, then what is H204? It’s for drinking, washing and swimming, of course!
Have a gneiss day! This is one of the simplest rock puns, but it is certainly a gneiss way to start your day out right!
If I could change the periodic table, I would put Uranium and Iodine next to each other.
What is the difference between a chemist and a geologist? While a geologist will drink anything fermented, a chemist just
drinks anything that is distilled.
Why is the world so diverse? Because it contains alkynes of people.
I really hate rock puns.
My sediments exactly.
Why was the sedimentary rock so cheap?
It was always on shale.
When were rock puns the funniest?
During the stone age.
What did the diamond say to its friend copper? Nothing, silly, minerals don’t talc!
Why was the sedimentary rock so cheap? It was always on shale.
What type of weapon can you make with potassium, iron and nickel? A KniFe.
Why did the tectonic plates break up? It wasn’t her fault, but there was just too much friction between them.
What do you call a benzene ring where the iron atoms replacing all of the carbon atoms?
A ferrous wheel.
What did the gold say to the pyrite?
You’re a fool and a fake!
Does anyone remember the joke about the sodium deposits? Na.
What happens when you blend sulfur, tungsten and silver together? SWAG.
What kind of magazine does a rock like to read?
Rolling Stone.
What did the gold say to the pyrite? You’re a fool and a fake!
Where do rocks like to sleep? In bedrocks!
Why are geologists great dates?
They can make your bedrock.
You want to hear the best rock puns? Give me a moment and I’ll dig something up.
What do you call a benzene ring where the iron atoms replacing all of the carbon atoms? A ferrous wheel.
They consider a million years ago to be Recent.
What did the metamorphic rock say during the test?
This is too much pressure!
Why did the fold get arrested?
Because it was caught rolling a joint.
What did the metamorphic rock say during the test? This is too much pressure!
What do you call a periodic table when the gold is missing? Au revoir.
What happens when you keep reading geology jokes in your free time? You know that you have really hit rock bottom.
What do you call an Irish gem that’s a fake?
A sham rock.
What element comes from Norse mythology? Thorium.
How do blondes define hydrophobic on their school tests? A fear of utility bills.
Why was the sedimentary rock extra cheap?
Because it was on shale.
What do rocks eat?
Pom-a-granites.
Why are mountains not just funny? Because they are hilarious.
Why should you never tell jokes about radon, cobalt and yttrium? They are just too CoRnY.
What do you call a rock that never goes to school? A skipping stone!
Why can’t minerals ever lie?
They’re always in their pure form.
What did the chemist cowboy tell his horse? HIO Ag!
What did the motivational speaker say?
Don’t take life for granite.
Why did the toddler chew on pebbles? He wanted to eat rock candy.
What did the teenage rock say after failing its drive test? I don’t want to talc about it.
What happens if someone chucks a rock at you? You hit the rock’s bottom.
What did the boy volcano say to the girl volcano? I really lava you!
What is black, purple, blue, yellow and white? Sugilite, sardonyx and opal all fighting over a gumball.
Rock was magma before it was cool.
You want to hear the best rock puns?
Give me a moment and I’ll dig something up.
What do you call a can of pop found in a conglomerate?
Coca-Cola Clastic.
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