What do you call a rock that never goes to school? A skipping stone!
Why was the sedimentary rock extra cheap?
Because it was on shale.
I really hate rock puns.
My sediments exactly.
Why did the toddler chew on pebbles? He wanted to eat rock candy.
Where do rocks like to sleep?
In bedrocks!
Why can’t minerals ever lie?
They’re always in their pure form.
If I could change the periodic table, I would put Uranium and Iodine next to each other.
What do you call a can of soda in a conglomerate? Coca-Cola Clastic.
Why are mountains not just funny? Because they are hilarious.
What do you call an Irish gem that’s a fake?
A sham rock.
What do you call a benzene ring where the iron atoms replacing all of the carbon atoms?
A ferrous wheel.
Why are geologists great dates?
They can make your bedrock.
When were rock puns the funniest?
During the stone age.
What did the gold say to the pyrite? You’re a fool and a fake!
What did the rock say to the word processor?
Boulder.
What is black, purple, blue, yellow and white?
Sugilite, sardonyx and opal all fighting over a gumball.
What do you call a periodic table when the gold is missing? Au revoir.
What did the bartender say when he saw oxygen, hydrogen, sulfur, sodium and phosphorous enter his barroom? OH SnaP!
What happens when you blend sulfur, tungsten and silver together? SWAG.
Why is the world so diverse? Because it contains alkynes of people.
What do you call a rock that never goes to school?
A skipping stone!
Where do rocks like to sleep? In bedrocks!
What did the gold say to the pyrite?
You’re a fool and a fake!
What do rocks eat?
Pom-a-granites.
What kind of magazine does a rock like to read?
Rolling Stone.
What do you call a periodic table when the gold is missing?
Au revoir.
Rock was magma before it was cool.
Did you want to hear the joke about the mountain? Never mind, you would never get over it.
What did the metamorphic rock say during the test? This is too much pressure!
Why is the world so diverse?
Because it contains alkynes of people.
Why should you never expect perfection from geologists?
Because they all have their faults.
You want to hear the best rock puns?
Give me a moment and I’ll dig something up.
What is black, purple, blue, yellow and white? Sugilite, sardonyx and opal all fighting over a gumball.
Why do earth science professors always talk about ammonia? Because it’s basic material.
How do blondes define hydrophobic on their school tests? A fear of utility bills.
Does anyone remember the joke about the sodium deposits? Na.
What type of fruit includes Barium and double Sodium? BaNaNa.
Did you hear about the metamorphosis professor who just gave up on life? He really needed a change.
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