What do you call a boat full of polite football players?
A good sportsman ship
I may not be the biggest football fan, but I love tight ends.
A knife tried out for Varsity football.
It didn't make the cut.
[Chicken] We’re serving this during the game, so you might call it a live ball fowl.
All punts are highly intended
We’re calling your number.
Why couldn't the warden decide whether to allow the prison football team play the professional football team?
The idea had its pros and cons.
What’s a Movers favorite football team?
The Packers!
I’ve been getting blitzed all game.
Join us for plenty of play action.
Why couldn't the skeleton play football?
He didn't have the guts.
I had a really good fantasy football team.
Then, My Luck ran out.
Kicking off the afternoon in the best way possible
Where do sperm play football?
In a con-dome.
[Beer] This is my number one draft pick.
Why don’t quarterbacks share puns at the line of scrimmage?
Because they produce audible groans!
No intentional frowning is allowed here.
We’ll kickoff the party with some cocktails.
How do you call football without shoes?
Socker.
What do you call a horse that is good at football?
Neighhhhh-mar.
Why did the uncouth spud not stop talking during the football game?
Because he was a common-tater.
What do Walter Payton and Luke Skywalker have in common?
They both did great with a hand off!
Did you hear about the football team that drafted a vending machine?
They really needed a quarter back!
Having a ball this weekend with my best friends
I made a snap decision to watch football today.
My girlfriend told me she's breaking up with me because of my football obsession.
I told her she'll need to wait till the summer window if she wants a free transfer.
I’m establishing my punning game early today.
Why was the football pitch a triangle?
Because someone took a corner
Football is one habit I will never kick
Did you hear about the fumbled exorcism? The guy retained possession!
Staying humble thanks to that fumble
What stat do the Miami Dolphins lead every single year?
All Porpoise Yardage!
Why is Cinderella bad at football?
Because she’s always running away from the ball.
[Chips] This is what I call a chip shot.
A goal new ball game I he a kick outta you
What type of football player is the biggest drug addict?
The lineman.
Which is the coolest football team in Italy?
AC Milan.
Why did the quarterback suddenly walk off the field?
The coach told him to take a hike!
What must the Oregon football team do before each play?
Get all of their ducks in a row.
I just watched Sunday Night Football.
There were Lutz and Lutz of field goals.
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