There are many grounds religious children can practice their soccer skills. However, most of them love the prayground.
I tried to start a soccer club so I put up some posters on a local bulletin board.
Just to get the ball rolling.
Did you know Karl Marx's sister invented the starting pistol?
Her name was Onya Marx.
I had a really good fantasy football team.
Then, My Luck ran out.
What is a cyclops' favorite winter activity?
Sking. That's like skiing, but only with one eye.
Staying humble thanks to that fumble
Why didn’t the golfer get his homework done?
He wouldn’t stop puttering around.
Brother: "I saw a seahorse scuba diving"
Dad: "Wow that's amazing, I didn't realise they had the technology."
Will the Red Wings be able to replace their venerable captain Steve? No, because
when it comes to hockey smarts there is no Yzer man.
Have you ever played quiet tennis?
It's just like regular tennis but without the racket.
The ref keeps shafting us the offsides; I think he's blue lyin'.
What do a great hitter and a boxer have in common?
Both are serious sluggers.
Why wasn’t the little pumpkin allowed to swim?
There was no life gourd on duty!
What is a defensive football players favorite dessert?
Apple Turnover.
Oh, I thought I was playing the first round, but I guess I got a free pass. Bye.
We like rough sets. As long as you practice safe sets, there isn’t a problem.
Why did the volleyball player cross the street? There were players on the other side.
Which LA King was the total package? Parcel Dionne.
You should call us butter because we are on a roll. This would be one of the best volleyball puns to put on a T-shirt.
The only difference between time and a ball hog is that the former passes.
What is a bird that flies over a football field called?
A fieldgull.
Would they get two minutes for tripping?
Not if they spliff the defence.
What do you call a married couple who compete in the marathon side-by-side?
Running mates.
After the Moroccan scored a Hat-trick, the players gathered for the fez-off.
Hope you’re wide open on [date].
Why did the other volleyball team bow? Because they heard that the queens of the court were there.
The success in this sport is not how you bowl, but how you roll.
What does a volleyball player do when they go to prom? They spike the punch.
Ed Belfour's new contract offer isn't high compared to other goal tenders.
Our game is as tight as our spandex. This would be an awesome team motto.
The main difference between a dog and a basketball player is that one dribbles while the other one drools.
I saw the chicken quickly crossing the basketball court? Then I remembered that the referee was blowing fowls.
Which hulking left-winger could body-slam The Giant? Dave Andre-chuck.
I almost brought a screwdriver to the football game, but was stopped by security
They said that match-fixing isn't allowed.
Why do you need six players to carry the volleyball to the game? No one can carry the volleyball and a whole team.
Which cartoon character is the best at baseball?
Homer Simpson.
Is your nickname cream cheese? Because you’re about to get bageled.
Who directs all of the movies about volleyball injuries? Spike Lee.
I hate when I have to stop scuba diving
If makes me deep-pressed
Beauty is only pig skin deep
Having a ball this weekend with my best friends
My football teammate asked me, “On a scale of 1-10, how do you rate our after-victory celebration?”
I gave him a high five.
The only way athletes can stay cool even in a charged game is by standing near the fans.
Having a ball
My moment in the sun.
What do you call it when a football player suffers a career-ending injury in his last game before retirement? Gridirony!
What are the rules in zebra baseball?
Three stripes, and you're out.
Which Star Wars movie is a baseball player's least favorite?
The Umpire Strikes Back.
Where's the weak spot on a Scottish goalie? The fief hole.
What did they call Dracula after his team won the big game?
The Champire.
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