Australia announced that they have begun dumping sewage into the ocean
It’s now classified as an in-continent.
What is the best way to communicate with a fish?
Drop it a line!
What do baleen whales call a hook-up?
Netflix and krill.
What does a mermaid wear to math class?
An algae-bra, naturally.
Have you heard about the restaurant that caters exclusively to dolphins?
It only has one customer, but at least it serves a porpoise.
Did you hear about the red ship that collided with the blue ship?
All the sailors were marooned.
How do you cut an ocean in half?
With a seasaw!
What did the tuna say to her overzealous partner?
I think we need to scale things back here.
What does the fish say when she disagrees with her husband?
I don’t quite sea it that way.
What lies at the bottom of the ocean and twitches?
A nervous wreck.
Where do shellfish go to borrow money?
The prawn broker.
Why is the ocean always blue?
Because the shore never waves back.
I was going to tell a joke about the natural disaster in the Indian Ocean
But it was too Tsunami.
I was trying to look at a picture of the ocean but kept having to reload the page, it finally worked after 5 attempts.
That was refreshing to sea.
Did you hear about the sea captain who made a special salt-proof boat for the salty waters of the ocean?
It was a sailing solution to cross a saline solution
What is a blue whale’s favourite James Bond Film?
Licence to Krill.
Do you know what would happen when you throw a Finnish sailor into the ocean?
Helsinki.
Why did the lobster blush?
Because the sea weed.
What did one tidepool say to the other tidepool?
Show me your mussels!
My dad hates the ocean, but the other day he bought a boat.
He never could resist a good sail.
What did the ocean say when asked if he wanted to be friends with the beach?
“Shore!”
Why Did the Whale Cross the Ocean?
To get to the other tide.
Are you addicted to the ocean and ocean life?
If you are, sea kelp
Did you hear about the lawyer who tried to sue a shark for biting all his limbs off?
He didn’t have a leg to stand on.
Why does it take pirates so long to learn the alphabet?
Because they spend years at C!
What did the wise papa fish tell his son?
Keep your friends close and your anemones closer.
Where does a killer whale go for braces?
The orca-dontist.
Why are seabirds so lucky in love?
Because one good tern always deserves another.
How do you split the ocean in half?
With a sea-saw.
Why do freshwater fish cry so much?
They’re just a stream of emotions.
What do you call a big fish that makes you an offer you can’t refuse?
The Codfather.
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