What is an ogre's favorite snack?
Y-ogre-t.
Two ghosts were at a disco. One was having a fa-boo-lous time and the other wanted to boo-gie all night long!
How do werewolves eat lunch?
They wolf it down.
You can't ever get the attention of a vampire on Halloween. They're way too busy looking for their necks victim.
What does a vampire do after taking a shower?
It stands on a bat mat.
What did the ghost teacher say to her class? - Look at the board and I’ll go through it, again.
What do you learn in witch school?
Spelling.
What kind of vehicle does Bigfoot drive?
A big toe-truck.
What do you call a clever monster?
Frank Einstein.
I feel like I have seen that ghost before...I must have deja boo.
What is a baby sasquatch's favorite toy?
His Yeti Bear!
What do vampires use when baking cakes?
Batter.
What do you call a witch's spotless garage?
A broom closet.
What sound does it make when an ogre eats a witch for breakfast?
Snap cackle n' pop
What did daddy ghoul say to his youngest son?
Stop ghouling around!
What is a skeleton’s favorite instrument?
A trom-bone.
What cheese do vampires eat?
Munster.
What does Bigfoot say when he sees campers in sleeping bags?
- Yum, Hot Pockets!
What is a zombie that speaks two languages?
Zombilingual.
What happened to the man who didn’t pay his exorcist? His house was repossessed.
Why did the skeletons form a rock band?
They wanted to “Rattle them bones”!
Everyone loves my Halloween costume, but I still see room for improvement.
I guess I'm an ogre-achiever.
Normal Zombies: BRAAINNNNSSS!!
Vegetarian Zombies: GRAAINNNNSSS!!
Body Builder Zombies: GAAINNNNSSS!!
Plumber Zombies: DRAAINNNNSSS!!
Conductor Zombies: TRAAINNNNSSS!!
Weatherman Zombies: RAAINNNNSSS!!
What do you call the last skeleton on earth?
The end-o skeleton.
Did you know Doctor Frankenstein used to be a lonely, lonely man?
Then he learned how to make friends.
What does a skeleton order at a restaurant?
Spare ribs.
Why did the poor werewolf chase his own tail?
He was trying to make ends meet.
What do you call a zombie who stir-fries?
Dead Man Wokking
How do you know if you are dealing with a smart zombie?
They are wearing helmets!
Did you hear about the person who watched too many Shrek movies?
He ogre-dosed.
I used to be a werewolf but I’m ok noooooooooooow!!
What happened when the monster's football game was all tied up?
They went into ogre time.
Why was Van Helsing so dedicated to killing Count Dracula?
Because he staked his whole reputation on it!
All vampires seem to have the same thing for their last meal. A stake.
Who babysits young Bigfoots?
Sasq-watcher.
Why do Minotaurs make terrible detectives?
Because they hate to go on steak-outs!
What do you call a mythical being working in a smoothie store?
Mejuicea.
Where do vampire bats go to take out a loan?
To the blood bank.
What's a werewolf healed from Lycanthropy?
Over the moon.
Why did Frankenstein tiptoe past the medicine cabinet?
He didn’t want to wake the sleeping pills!
What do you do when a ton of ghosts show up at your house? Hope that it’s Halloween!
What do you get when you cross a werewolf and a vampire?
A fur coat that fangs around your neck.
Which building do vampires always visit when in New York?
The Vampire State Building.
How does a werewolf make bechamel sauce?
They start with a rooooooooouuuuuuuux.
Where are werewolf movies made?
Howl-lywood.
What did one werewolf say when he saw his friend?
- Howl’s it going?
What is a favorite game for ghouls?
Chase!
I’ve found that dressing up like this has truly been an en-witching experience.
- Do old zombie actors ever die?
- Yes, they sometimes drop a part.
Why was the ghoul so smart?
He always ate brain food!
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