What kind of hat does a skeleton wear at Easter?
A Bone-et.
It's true what they say about scaring vampires with a torch.
You can see it in their fright of light response.
Why are witches good at farming?
Because they love occult-ivation.
Did you hear about the witch who got plastic surgery?
She looked really good afterworts.
Why did the troll fall back with his army?
He didn't want to be ogre-run by the enemy.
Halloween was nearly over, and the zombie was hurrying to get back to her tomb before the sun came up.
She was rushing so much, she didn't even notice the headstone was the wrong shape before she got in. It was a grave mistake.
The skeleton ordered a cabernet wine with a full body because he didn't have one.
How did the witch feel about using her broom to do housework?
She bristled at the suggestion!
What happens when Bigfoot gets lost in the fog?
He is mist!
Draw me like one of your French ghouls.
You have to hunt down a troll and kill it with a gun. After you find it, you accidently lose sight of it. In rage, you fire your gun. The bullets hit the troll and it dies.
What do you tell the person who sent you on the quest?
- I lost gun-trol.
Who turns the lights off on Halloween?
The light's witch.
What game do Ghost children play? Hide and shriek!
Frankenstein's monster and the bride of Frankenstein sit down for dinner
Bride: How come you never help with the dinner
Frankenstein: I did
Bride: How?
Frankenstein: I did the mash...
Bride: Don't you dare
What do you call a necromancer werewolf?
A dog with a bone.
What do you call a werewolf escapologist?
Hairy Houdini.
What did the witch do when her broomstick broke?
She witch-hiked.
Where do werewolves hate shopping?
The flea market.
What did the skeleton say to his girlfriend?
- Will you marrow me?
My wife and my friends are sick of my puns about The Abominable Snowman.
Yeti keep cracking them.
What kind of makeup do zombies wear?
Mas-scare-a.
What is a skeleton’s favorite mode of transport?
A scare-plane.
What did the werewolf say when he sat on sandpaper?
- Ruff!
Which ghost is the best dancer? The Boogie Man.
Who cast the spell of sleep on Dorothy? It was the wicked witch of rest.
How does a vampire keep fit?
Batminton.
What sound does it make when an ogre eats a witch for breakfast?
Snap cackle n' pop
What do you call someone who specializes in growing plants used in witches’ brews?
A hag-riculturist!
What's a ghost with a broken leg called? A hoblin goblin.
When they want to relax, ghosts have a boo-ble bath.
Where do zombies go sailing?
Lake Eerie.
How is Big Foot so good at rock climbing?
He always finds the biggest footholds.
Where do fashionable ghosts shop for sheets? Bootiques.
Why did the witch go to the doctor?
She had a dizzy spell.
Who does a witch call for help with computer problems?
Hex Support!
I knew a vampire who was trying to become an actor. He gave it his best shot, but ended up retraining. He just couldn't find a role he could sink his teeth into.
You hear about the werewolf who majored in philosophy?
Now he's a whywolf
What did the zombie say when she fell out with her vampire friend?
- You're dead to me!
What is a Ghost’s favourite film? Paranormal Activity.
What sign was posted in the witches' parking lot?
Violators will be toad.
What do you call a skeleton who goes out in the snow?
A numb-skull.
What time do werewolf Cowboys have a shootout?
High Moon!
How do you get rid of a witch’s hex?
Draw a hex-a-gone.
I used to be a werewolf but I’m ok noooooooooooow!!
How do you kill a southern vampire?
You bless his heart.
What do you call a witch's spotless garage?
A broom closet.
Who is the most famous French skeleton?
Napolean Bone-aparte.
Why did the skeleton have to testify in court?
Because he was a body of evidence.
What is a baby sasquatch's favorite toy?
His Yeti Bear!
Why don't zombies eat comedians?
They taste funny.
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