What is a skeleton’s favorite type of film to watch?
A spine-tingler.
What does one vampire say to another before bed?
- I hope you have a fang-tastic day!
Why did Frankenstein’s monster go to a psychiatrist?
He thought he had a screw loose.
I wish medusa would stop objectifying people.
What kind of potatoes do zombies like?
Monster mash.
Why didn’t the lady skeleton wear a bikini?
Because she was big boned.
How do ghouls sign off a letter?
Best witches and worm regards.
Why did the skeletons stay out of the forest?
Because sticks and stones will break their bones.
Where is the ghost going on holiday the next year? Lake Eerie.
Why can’t skeletons play church music?
Because they have no organs.
What do you call a very active hydra?
Hydradynamic.
Why do ghouls like ice cream?
Because it’s ghoulilicous!
What do you call a dog that comes back from the dead?
A zom-beagle.
Why couldn't the troll catch any fish?
Because other people took the bait.
What did one werewolf say when he saw his friend?
- Howl’s it going?
"If you want to pass this point alive, you must answer my riddle: What goes on four legs in the morning, two legs at noon and on three legs in the evening?" the Sphinx asked.
Oedipus pondered for a moment, "Probably one of those new Pokemones," he finally replied. "There is like 600 of them.
"Fair enough man," spoke the Sphinx. "I can't reasonably expect you to remember all their names. You may pass."
Why are skeletons so good at chopping down trees?
They're LUMBARjacks!
What do you call a rich goblin?
GOBLING.
Why do Ghosts make such good company? They are full of spirit.
Two skeletons are talking in a bar.
Skeleton 1: "Are you going to the funeral tomorrow?"
Skeleton 2: “Of corpse I am.”
What type of art do skeletons like?
Skulltures!
What do Krakens eat?
Fish and ships.
A werewolf's favorite day of the week is Moonday.
Ghosts drop off their babies at the day-scare centre when they go to work.
Have you heard about the Italian Bigfoot?
The spag-yeti.
There is a Giant Screwdriver attacking the city. Please seek shelter immediately. This is not a drill.
What did the doctor say to the skeleton who had a temperature of 103 degrees?
- Looks like you are running a femur.
Did you hear how the zombie bodybuilder hurt his back?
He was dead lifting.
Did you hear about the ghoul who had eight arms?
He was very handy!
What is it called when a skeleton lawyer works for free!
Pro Bone-O.
How did Poseidon greet the sea monster?
- Hey buddy, what's kraken?
What did the woman say when she escaped Dracula’s clutches?
- Better luck necks time!
Don't get too close to a vampire, they have a serious case of bat breath.
Can’t take my eyes off of her brewtiful face.
- Do old zombie actors ever die?
- Yes, they sometimes drop a part.
What did the giant say after he ate Fiji?
- I want Samoa!
Scientists believe that one day we will find Sasquatch, just...
Not Yeti.
What does a skeleton use to cut through objects?
A shoulder blade.
What's the slogan for the New York Demon Chomping Advocacy Group?
Gobble the ghoul.
What did the last of the zombies say to the survivers of the apocalypse?
- It’s been a living hell with you guys around.
Come witch me to the party.
What do you call a zombie with lots of kids?
A mom-ster.
How does Big Foot find his way through the deepest darkest forests?
He just follows the big footpath!
What do you call the ghost of a door-to-door salesman? A dead ringer.
What did the zombie get when she was late to dinner?
The cold shoulder.
What happened when the monster's football game was all tied up?
They went into ogre time.
According to Greek mythology, Chiron was a half horse half human doctor.
This made him the Centaur for Disease Control.
The local vampire society is constantly growing. They are always looking for new blood.
Why do Ghosts avoid the rain? It dampens their spirits.
What is a baby sasquatch's favorite toy?
His Yeti Bear!
Go to BabaMail
