I like big punts and I cannot lie
Did you hear that Notre Dame gave up four interceptions last week?
Knute Rockne would turnover in his grave!
What did the football player say to his Chinese son
Go Long!
Did I tell you about my new girlfriend who also plays football?
Yeah.. she‘s a keeper
This event is sure to be out of bounds.
My football teammate asked me, “On a scale of 1-10, how do you rate our after-victory celebration?”
I gave him a high five.
What’s the difference between a punter and punster?
A punster gets his kicks with bad puns like these!
Join us for plenty of play action.
Why’s it always hot after a football game?
All the fans left.
Why did the football coach attempt to destroy the vending machine?
Cuz it wouldn't give him his quarterback.
Why did the uncouth spud not stop talking during the football game?
Because he was a common-tater.
[Donuts] We’re going the hole nine yards for this game.
I have a lot of respect for fans of football teams that consist of only ghosts
They have a lot of spirit.
[Drink] That’s a thirst down!
The football won’t be the only thing spiked at this party.
What happened when the football coach’s dog ran onto the field during a game?
He got called for ineligible retriever down field!
I went to Oxford University, where I was a philosophy major and the starting goalkeeper on the football team.
They called me Soccertes.
Football is one habit I will never kick
Why was McGruff the Crime Dog ejected from the football game?
He was called for unnecessary gruffness!
Why don’t quarterbacks share puns at the line of scrimmage?
Because they produce audible groans!
Don’t pass on this party – rush on over.
I almost brought a screwdriver to the football game, but was stopped by security
They said that match-fixing isn't allowed.
We’re calling your number.
Why did the football referee have trouble measuring the first down?
Someone was yanking his chain!
What is a bird that flies over a football field called?
A fieldgull.
What is a defensive football players favorite dessert?
Apple Turnover.
Jokes are a lot like American football.
If you haven't gotten anywhere with the first three tries, you'll need to rely on your punner.
What do you do if a running back swallows the football?
You have to get him to cough it up!
I had a really good fantasy football team.
Then, My Luck ran out.
Why can’t a car play football?
Because it only has one boot.
Prepare to be bowled over.
Do you know why an octopus is so good at Football?
It gets ten tackles a play.
Why don't quarterbacks share puns at the line of scrimmage? Because they produce audible groans!
[Chicken] We’re serving this during the game, so you might call it a live ball fowl.
Why was the potato fired from his job at the football stadium?
He was a horrible commentater.
Why wasn’t the pig chosen in the football/soccer team?
It was a ball hogger.
Don’t drop the ball – without you, the party will be incomplete.
Here’s the game plan: [party details]
With salsa, cheese dip, and guac, our bowl game is hot.
[Chips] This is what I call a chip shot.
I’m establishing my punning game early today.
You shouldn't wear glasses when playing football...
They say it's a contact sport.
A knife tried out for Varsity football.
It didn't make the cut.
o my friend Justin was late for the football game.
But that’s okay because he arrived Justin time for kickoff.
Why couldn't the skeleton play football?
He didn't have the guts.
Why was the football pitch a triangle?
Because someone took a corner
Why did the quarterback suddenly walk off the field?
The coach told him to take a hike!
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