What is fire to a pyromaniac?
Just a warm-up.
Iron Man's favourite Xmas gifts this year were socks that fire from his feet.
He called them missile toes.
Why was the Blonde fired from the M&M factory?
She kept throwing away the W's.
A french farmer who owned an olive plantation had a huge fire
He was extremely sad, he had lost his all his huile d'olive.
A butt lit a house on fire.
So I guess he committed Arse-on
There was a fire at the yodeling school. Everyone was asked to exit in an orderly orderly orderly manner.
What do you call a woman who sets fire to all her bills ?
Bernadette.
My son and I went camping yesterday and when he asked me how to start a campfire, I explained, "You can start a fire by rubbing two sticks together, but make sure they’re the same..."
"Then you’ll have a match."
I stole fire from the gods.
But I couldn't fence it. It was too hot.
Most people have off on Independence Day. Except fire.
Fire-works on 4th of July.
My boss told me that he was going to fire the person with the worst posture
I have a hunch, it might be me.
The coffee shop kept samples of burnt coffee as evidence to fire their roaster.
It was used as grounds for dismissal.
If H20 is in the inside of a fire hydrant, what's on the outside ?
K9P.
I heard there are some fires near Greece
We’re gonna need a lot of baking soda.
My grand father always said "fight Fire with Fire".
He was a great man but a terrible Fireman
Why was the food critic fired?
They didn't reference their sauces
My boss fired me.
"Why?" I asked.
He said, "You always question authority."
"How?"
My Ex-wife called me to tell me my son was arrested for setting a house on fire. I corrected her saying...
Arson.
I got fired from the Calendar Factory yesterday
They say it's because I took a day off.
What did they use to set off the amazon warehouse fire?
Amazon kindle.
What did the beaver say when it saw it's home on fire?
Hot Dam!
When Smokey died in a forest fire, how did his body get to the cemetery ?
Pallbears.
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