Laundry puns?
I got loads of them.
Even the heaviest chandelier is pretty light.
I tried to taste the hot light bulb
But I got my tungstenned.
My wife told me to stop eating Christmas leftovers out the fridge...
But I just can’t quit cold turkey
The superconductor left without resistance.
TV repair during lockdown has been pretty easy.
It’s mostly remote work.
What do you get when you put a saxophonist in a freezer?
Cool jazz.
At what point will you love to change your bulbs the most?
When sparks fly.
Asked my boy to boil the kettle.
He said, "wouldn't it be better to boil some water?"
I wonder who invented the air conditioner...
Must’ve been a pretty cool guy.
Why did bulb pack an apple in his bag?
He wanted to have a light snack.
Why did the man eat the light bulb? He was hoping it would give him a bright idea.”
Where do light bulbs go shopping?
The outlet stores.
"Is your dishwasher running?"
"Seeing as it doesn't have feet, it does not"
Why did the lights go out? Because they liked each other!”
I took my friends watch that had an LED flashlight on it.
Now it's my time to shine.
My wife left a note on the fridge, saying, "This isn't working. Goodbye."
I opened it and it works fine.
It’s crazy that Dubai doesn’t show The Flintstones on TV...
But Abu Dhabi Do!
The tea pot sounds so angry!
Nah, its just letting off some steam.
I put some big, giant, large, massive, enormous, huge bread in the toaster.
I was making synonym toast.
Toasters were the first form of pop-up notifications.
Something is odd about my hot stove.
I just can't quite put my finger on it.
I heard my son complaining about doing laundry.
He said, 'These just socks'.
My friend pointed at a chandelier and said: "isn't that the coolest chandelier ever?"
I replied: "I don't know if it's the coolest, but it's up there."
I think my heater is sick.
It's hot.
I got tricked into buying a cooling fan that didn't work...
It was an air con.
Why did the freezer run away on its marriage?
It got cold feet
The repair man said he thought he'd fixed the propane stoves, but he couldn't be quite sure.
After all, it involved a lot of gaswork.
What do you call a skeleton in a freezer?
Bone-chilling.
What's the opposite of a microwave?
A Tsunami.
I used to get so mad when my kitchen appliances leaked
now it's just water under the fridge
You’re a unit of electrical energy, Harry.” I’m a watt?”
When I don't have time to iron a shirt, I just steel one.
Got into my car and realized my wife had shut off all the A/C vents.
Definitely not cool.
What’s the best tool to install an electrical plug with?
A socket wrench.
There's a programme about the history of perfume on TV tonight.
It's on at 8pm on Chanel Number 5!
My wife is threatening to leave me because of my obsession with acting like a TV news anchor.
More on this after the break.
Where do light bulbs go shopping? The outlet stores.”
The government is planning to ban articles about ironing appliances in the newspaper.
The freedom of press is no more.
My friend dragged me to a lecture about lamps. I though it would be boring but...
It was very illuminating.
How do you dry clothes on a line in winter?
You freeze dry them.
Why did the electrical cords break up? There was no spark between them.”
What did the toaster say to the criminal bread?
"I'm taking you into crustody"
I started ironing my clothes...
To de-crease how bad I looked
This morning, my dad told me something that gave me the chills.
He said, “I’m turning off the heating.”
When the heat turns down, we thieves gather in our secret hideout for a meeting.
We call it our Con Den session.
My mum asked me to watch the stove while she went to the bathroom. She was so angry when she got back...
Things really boiled over
Found out I washed some of my son's nerf darts in his laundry...
Should make for some good clean shots.
I put my fancy shirts in the freezer before I wear them.
It's cold fashion, look it up!
An electrician needed to change 8 fluorescent lamps to brighten up a large conference room at our office. I asked him if he needed a hand carrying them.
He said no, this is light.
Go to BabaMail
