Why was Cleopatra so in love with Egypt's ruler?
Pharaohmones
Who does a dead pharaoh talk to?
His mummy.
What do you call a ruler of Egypt that hunts whales with a folding bed?
Futon Harpoon
Why did the pharaoh go to the dentist?
Egypt his tooth.
Q: What was the pharaoh's favorite football team?
A: The Mummy Dolphins
What did the sign in the Egyptian funeral home say?
"Satisfaction guaranteed or double your mummy back"
Q: What did the mummy say to the zombie?
A: Quit ragging me out!
Did you hear about the Pharaoh who was lying in the wrong coffin? He made a grave mistake.
Who was the most flatulent Pharaoh in all of old Egypt?
King Tootsarecommon.
De-coffin-ated coffee is the favourite coffee of the mummy.
Unlike fairy tales, the stories of Egyptian mummies always goes from riches to rags.
Why do Egyptians shave their heads?
To make them more pharaoh-dynamic
Q: What was Cleopatra's favorite type of flower?
A: Chrysantha-mummies.
Q: Why was young Tutankhamun home from school?
A: He caught a gold.
What did the Egyptian boy say to the Egyptian girl?
Come behind the pyramid, I'll make you a mummy
Q: When is a Pharaoh like a piece of wood?
A: When he's a ruler.
Why do Pharaohs never tell dad jokes? Because they are all mummies.
Q: What do you say when a pharaoh doesn't pay you?
A: Egypted me! (He jipped me)
Where does a pharaoh use the bathroom?
A pee-ramid
Q: Why are ghosts scared of mummies?
A: They tear up the ghost's sheets
What's an Ancient Egyptian favorite restaurant?
Pizza Tut!
What kind of girl does a mummy take on a date?
Any old girl he can dig up!
Q: Which pretty actress was an ancient Egyptian favorite?
A: Pharaoh Fawcett
What did the thirsty mummy do?
They put on a thirst aid bandage.
Who said that the pyramids are the tallest structure in Egypt? They are just between pyra-highs and pyra-lows.
In ancient Egypt, how did insects communicate?
Pharaoh moans
Mummies are very aware of investment security. Their favorite is Cryptocurrency.
What is the favourite food of the Egyptian god? It is the Ramen.
If Roman Emperor Nero was born in Egypt..
He might have been a Far-o.
Q: Why did the mummy walk out of his tomb after 1000 years?
A: He figured he was old enough to leave home
Q: Why was the Pharaoh wet?
A: He was the reigning ruler.
Q: How did the Pharaoh get to school?
A: In Anubis.
Why was Cleopatra so in love with Egypt's ruler?
Pharaohmones
What type of food do mummies like?
Chicken wraps.
Did you hear about the scary couple in prom this year? It was a mummy and his ghoul-friend.
Q: Why didn't the Pharaoh know where he was?
A: He skipped history class.
Q: What brand of underwear do pharaohs wear?
A: Fruit of the Tomb.
Where do mummies go for a swim? To the Dead Sea.
How did Ozymandias became the greatest Pharaoh of Egypt?
He rammed everything that he sees
Why wasn't the archaeologist interested in girls?
Because he only dated mummies.
What happens to Egyptian girls who forget to take their pills?
They become mummies.
Approximately how many Egyptians can be fitted inside a pyramid? A pharaoh mount.
How do you use an ancient Egyptian doorbell?
Toot-and-come-in.
What do you call an ancient Egyptian chef?
Gordon Ramses.
What did the Egyptian Pharaoh do when he got caught in traffic?
ANKH ANKH!!
Why was the Egyptian kid confused?
His daddy was his mummy!
What did they call mummy makers in ancient Egypt? Sarcophaguy.
Archeologists say that mummies are very hard to find. Because they're all kept under wraps.
What did one pyramid say to the other? Hey! Where's your mummy?
Who fixed people's backs in ancient Egypt?
Cairo practers.
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