What do chemists call a benzene ring with iron atoms replacing the carbon atoms?
A ferrous wheel.
A wind turbine saw a solar panel at an energy convention. He leaned in and shouted, Hey, I’m a big fan!”
Got my new blender yesterday but I can't tell if I like or not though...
It keeps giving me mixed results.
Why didn't the peasants attend the Egyptian king's open palace party?
The address was "2, Pharaoh Way"
Helium walks into a bar. The bartender says, "We don't serve noble gases here."
Helium doesn't react.
Why are automatic doors like knights?
Because they're chivalrous!
Why was Pavlov's hair so soft?
Classical conditioning.
What do you call a musician who just saw Medusa?
A rockstar!
What do you call a knight who wants to overthrow the King?
Sir Plant.
I just found out you should never put a bar of soap in the dishwasher.
It's hand wash only.
What is the difference between lightning and electricity. For electricity, you need to pay, but
lightning kills for free.”
What do you call a Medieval knight who's always sure of himself?
Sir Tainly.
Last night I turned my wife on by ironing one side of her shirt...
I was pressing all the right buttons.
How did the English major define microtome on his biology exam? An itsy bitsy book.
A photon checks into a hotel and is asked if he needs any help with his luggage.
It replied, “No, thanks, I am traveling light.”
Last Christmas, I got my sister a build-it-yourself medieval fort. She wasn't very happy with it, but my mother reprimanded her by saying that it isn't the gift, but the fort that counts!
How many software engineers do you need to change a light bulb?
None – it’s a hardware problem.
Where do Viking warrior scrabble champions go when they die?
Vowel-halla
I just built a car out of a washing machine.
I’ll be taking it for a spin later.
Who is a geologist’s favorite band?
The Rolling Stones.
Why was the roman soldier kicked out of the army? Because he was roamin around during war.
Where do you bury dead people? Asymmetry
Why was the geologist always depressed?
He had a hard rock life.
Where do hippos go to university? Hippocampus.
Why are geologists good at stand up comedy?
They know really “dirty” jokes.
How do medieval cathedrals clean their mouths before bedtime?
They gargoyle
What’s the best way to serve pi?
A la mode. Anything else is mean.
What do you call a worm that chews up power cords? An electro-maggot.”
Watson: Holmes, What kind of rock is this?
Holmes: Sedimentary, my dear Watson.
In history class, the teacher taught said the Magna Carta was signed in 1215 and to write an essay on it. A student handed in his work with "The Magna Carta was signed in 1215" written 150 times.
The teacher asked the boy, "Why did you write this?" The boy replied, "Because you always say that history repeats itself!"
Did you hear about the geologist who was reading a book about Helium?
He just couldn’t put it down.
My English teacher told us to write about the history of our life. However, I hate writing, so I used AI to write it for me.
I guess you can say it's an auto-biography.
Why was the math book sad?
Because it had so many problems.
My poor knowledge of Greek mythology has always been my Achilles elbow.
To get to the other tide.
The photographer mummy was done with his shoot. So he told his crew to wrap it up.
What do the early European settlers in America have in common with ants?
They both lived in colonies!
During the medieval time period, there weren't many extremely bad people. There were only mid-evil people during that age.
How do you turn a duck into a soul singer?
Stick him in an oven until his Bill Withers
How does the mother call the pharaoh son to the table?
Tutan, come on.
I'm fascinated by water's gas form.
It mist-ifies me.
Which famous Roman suffered from hayfever?
Julius Sneezer.
What does a confident kettle have
Self-e-steam
The optimist sees the glass half full.
The pessimist sees the glass half empty.
The chemist see the glass completely full, half in the liquid state and half in the vapor state.
How is a dog and a marine biologist alike? One wags a tail and the other tags a whale.
Why did Rome Fall?
Because it slipped on some Greece.
Why was the king only a foot tall?
Because he was a ruler.
Where do light bulbs go shopping? The outlet stores.”
When the Frenchman asked for a book on warfare on Battle of Waterloo from his librarian, she said, "You're just going to lose it."
What is the name of that knight who is very fond of the sea and spends most of his time at sea beaches? We call him Sir Fer.
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