The superconductor left without resistance.
What did one pyramid say to the other? Hey! Where's your mummy?
What veggie should you avoid buying if your fridge is tiny?
Fungi. They take up too mushroom.
I think my window air conditioner needs an ambulance.
It keeps hyperventilating.
The Vikings had an initiative tradition where a child had to participate in a raid to become a full man.
As they say, it takes a pillage to raise a child.
Hey why Are The Viruses All Gone? Cause They "flu" AWAY.
What did the gladiator say when he was surrounded by nearly 100 men?
IC
What does Avogadro put in his hot chocolate?
Marsh-mole-ows
Why are refrigerator shelves hipsters?
They were there before it was cool.
It is no wonder that Thomas Jefferson was thus named, his father was after Jefferdad.
Why is wind power popular? Because it has a lot of fans!”
How do you turn a duck into a soul singer?
Stick him in an oven until his Bill Withers
My sister once took a knight as a dance partner to her high-school party because it was a prom knight.
I bought a secured warehouse where I keep appliances to clean pots, pans, plates, and silverware.
It's dishwasher safe!
Where does a pharaoh use the bathroom?
A pee-ramid
I just put some meat in the oven.
It’s bacon.
Why didn’t sin and tan go to the party?
Just cos.
Always knock on the fridge before opening.
Just in case there is a salad dressing
What's a freezer's favorite time period?
The ice age!
Whats The Most tiniest Virus Ever? "smallpox".
Why was Cleopatra so in love with Egypt's ruler?
Pharaohmones
What do you call a Smart TV?
In-telly-gent.
What was the most popular kids' movie in Ancient Greece?
Troy Story.
What’s the best tool to install an electrical plug with?
A socket wrench.
I had a friend who got a Ph.D. in the history of Palindromes. He is now called Dr. Awkward.
Just opened my water bill and my electricity bill at the same time… I was shocked.”
So earlier I took my clothes from the washer and threw them into the dryer.
I can't be sure how they felt about that, but they seemed agitated.
What to give your favorite electrical engineer for his birthday?
Shorts.
How did the mummy defeat Superman? He had Cryptonite.
What type of food do mummies like?
Chicken wraps.
Why do anti vaxxers hate vaccine jokes?
They never get them.
I can eat sugar with either hand, I'm ambidextrose.
Where would you find Hadrian's Wall?
At the bottom of his garden!
After suffering weak gain at the poles, the National Transistor Party has been trying to energize their base.
Why did the military use acid?
To neutralize the enemy base.
Why does a microwave hum?
Because it doesn't know the words
As a refrigerator technician, after a hard day on the job, I like to relax...
And chill out.
I sit in front if my ex in physics.
There used to be a lot of friction between us.
Why are teapots so expensive?
Because they make you pour!
I put some bread in the toaster this morning, but it never popped up again
I think it might be comatoast.
I General Lee do not find punny history jokes about the Civil War funny.
What football team do energy providers root for the most?
The Chargers.
Did you know they didn't have smart phones in ancient Rome?
They had tablets.
Roman soldiers are trained.
But Vikings are Bjorn.
What did the blender say to his crush?
"I have mixed feelings about you, but we might blend together perfectly."
My new toaster oven is a huge improvement for making lunch.
I used to eat unappetizing sandwiches but I quit cold turkey.
How do medieval cathedrals clean their mouths before bedtime?
They gargoyle
A knight bursts into a blacksmith and yells "You smelt my armor!"
The blacksmith was calm and collected and replied: "Yes, and what a lovely scent it had."
Did you hear about the mathematician who’s afraid of negative numbers?
He will stop at nothing to avoid them.
The biggest irony in the world's history is that the Russian alphabet has no letters in lowercase. It is all Capitalization.
Go to BabaMail
