What is a ghost's favorite place to work?
Ghoul-gle.
What was it like to fight Medusa?
- At first I was afraid, then I was petrified...
What did the zombie carrot say to the lettuce?
- Give me your heads!!
What did the angry witch do after sitting on her broomstick?
She flew off the handle.
Dr. Frankenstein must have been pretty buff.
He was a bodybuilder, after all.
At the Italian restaurant, the ghoul ordered spook-ghetti for his main course.
What is a skeleton’s favorite mode of transport?
A scare-plane.
Why did the monster call his werewolf “Frost”?
Because frost bites!
Why are witches good at farming?
Because they love occult-ivation.
What do a witch and a candle have in common?
They're both wicked.
Vampires love corny jokes and puns. I don't think they're funny, but it's probably to do with them being pun-dead.
What do vampires use when baking cakes?
Batter.
What do you call a Yeti Gardener?
A hairy potter.
A man has been arrested in South Africa for shooting a giant chess set
What's wrong with those big game hunters?!
What did the broken hearted skeleton say?
After all to-marrow is another day.
When the ghost blew his nose, lots of boo-gers came out.
Why do Ghosts avoid the rain? It dampens their spirits.
What do you call it when witches are optimistic about the future?
Witchful thinking.
What crosswords do zombies like?
Crypt-ic ones.
What do you call a witch who drives badly?
A road hag.
What is a baby sasquatch's favorite toy?
His Yeti Bear!
What do werewolf like for breakfast?
Pooched eggs.
What is the difference between a deer running away and a small witch?
One is a hunted stag and one is a stunted hag!
What’s a skeleton’s favorite plant?
A bone-zai.
How do you kill a southern vampire?
You bless his heart.
What happens when Bigfoot gets lost in the fog?
He is mist!
What do you call a skeleton who rings the doorbell?
A dead ringer.
Why is Frankenstein’s monster so popular?
He’s a real people person.
Was there a spark between Frankenstein and his bride?
Yes, he simply couldn’t resistor.
Who is Medusa’s cheesy cousin?
Gorgon Zola
What did the minotaur say to the real estate agent?
- Amazing.
What is it called when a witch only casts spells that rhyme?
Poetry in Potion.
What did the mummy say to the zombie?
- Stop ragging on me!
Stealthy minotaurs are always camooflauged.
How do ghouls sign off a letter?
Best witches and worm regards.
Why couldn't the troll catch any fish?
Because other people took the bait.
What did the Wicked Witch of the West say when she extracted metal from ore?
I’m smelting!
Witch doctors write their prescriptions in curse-ive.
What does a werewolf say in church?
Howleluia!
What do you call a goblin with an injured leg?
A hobblin' goblin.
How does Big Foot find his way through the deepest darkest forests?
He just follows the big footpath!
What is a werewolf’s favorite drink?
Moonshine.
I'd advise against letting a vampire drive you home after a Halloween party. They never check their mirrors, it will drive you batty.
What's the difference between an internet troll and a video game character?
Video game characters have lives.
I don't know what Dracula's address is, but I'm pretty sure he lives on a dead end street.
Why did people stop going to the ghoul hospital?
They kept coming out dead!
What does it take to become a zombie?
Dead-ication.
Normal Zombies: BRAAINNNNSSS!!
Vegetarian Zombies: GRAAINNNNSSS!!
Body Builder Zombies: GAAINNNNSSS!!
Plumber Zombies: DRAAINNNNSSS!!
Conductor Zombies: TRAAINNNNSSS!!
Weatherman Zombies: RAAINNNNSSS!!
Who babysits young Bigfoots?
Sasq-watcher.
How do you kill a troll?
Take away its internet access.
Go to BabaMail
