Zombies are dead but they live with it.
What is it called when a witch only casts spells that rhyme?
Poetry in Potion.
Pan wants to lead his kind to rebellion, but...
He can't get no Satyr Faction.
How do you kill a southern vampire?
You bless his heart.
The troll told his girlfriend that he was head ogre heels for her.
Shrek isn't bad, but he's not that great either. I guess you could say he's medi-ogre.
Why did the Ghosts win the soccer match? They scored more Ghouls.
What does one vampire say to another before bed?
- I hope you have a fang-tastic day!
What do you call a werewolf escapologist?
Hairy Houdini.
Why did the werewolf need to talk with the skeleton?
He had a bone to pick with him.
What do you call a nervous witch?
A twitch.
What game do Ghost children play? Hide and shriek!
Why do comedians hate telling jokes at zombie night?
All they hear is groans.
Why is the giant afraid of Jack?
Because Jack's beanstalking him.
What do you get if you cross a witch with a werewolf?
A mad dog that chases airplanes!
What kind of vehicle does Bigfoot drive?
A big toe-truck.
Why did the skeleton go to jail?
Because he was bad to the bone.
What do you call a hairy beast that no longer exists?
A were-wolf!
Witches are always wand-ering around…
What do you call a dad joke about skeletons?
A skele-pun!
What do you call the ghost of a door-to-door salesman? A dead ringer.
Which ghost is the best dancer? The Boogie Man.
Who are the cousins of the werewolf?
What-wolf and When-wolf
What do ghosts and monsters drink after scaring people?
Ghoul-Aid.
How do ghosts wash their hair? Sham-boo.
Why are ghouls so healthy?
They always eat fresh food!
Why did the monster call his werewolf “Frost”?
Because frost bites!
You will never see a vampire betting on the horses. They can't handle the stakes.
What did the tired witch do?
She sat down for a spell.
Dr. Frankenstein: Igor, have you seen my latest invention? It’s a new pill consisting of 50 percent glue and 50 percent aspirin.
Igor: But what is it for?
Dr. Frankenstein: For monsters with splitting headaches.
What happened when Dr. Frankenstein swallowed some uranium?
He got atomic ache.
How do you know if you are dealing with a smart zombie?
They are wearing helmets!
Why did the witch stay in a hotel during her travels?
She heard they had great broom service.
Why did the witch's team lose the cricket game?
Their bats flew away.
A boy ghost thought a girl ghost was cute so he asked if she would be his ghoul-friend.
How do ghosts stay fit? By exorcising daily.
Witch you were here.
When the ghost went to a fancy restaurant, he decided to wear a boo-tie.
Why did the skeleton start the fight?
He had a bone to pick.
The vampires were in a mood, so I thought I'd do something to cheer them up. They were over the moon that I re-vamped their castle.
What do you call a one-inch zombie?
Tomb thumb!
Why did the vampire refuse to eat his eggs?
Because they were sunny side up!
What problem do you encounter with twin witches?
You can never tell which is witch.
Why did the zombie bite off the comedian's hands?
His jokes were too funny to handle.
How does Big Foot find his way through the deepest darkest forests?
He just follows the big footpath!
What does it take to become a zombie?
Dead-ication.
Who cast the spell of sleep on Dorothy? It was the wicked witch of rest.
Why did king Minos put Minotaur inside a labyrinth?
He wanted to amaze his wife.
What do you call a herd of undead llamas?
The zombie alpacalypse.
I have no idea how so many people didn’t make it out the labyrinth.
It only took me a minotaur two.
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