Which one of King Arthur's knights named the Round Table?
Sir Cumference
I wouldn't trust medieval executioners in today's world.
They are prepared to kill people, simply to get a head.
What do you call a medieval horse in the army
A knight-mare
Why was the medieval knight polishing his dress before going for the Queens's dinner party? Because he wanted to have a night in shining armor!
What did the Medieval Gynecologist say to his patients?
At your cervix, m'lady
What was the nickname for the knight who ruled the fort?
"Fortnite"
What do you call a knight that jousts all the time
Sir Lance-alot
I think I met a medieval water snake
But I can't tell if it actually happened or if it was a dream.
It was totally Sir Eel.
Medieval scientists were known to be very arrogant and stubborn. They thought that everything revolved around them!
What do you call 3 knights in a relationship?
Polyarmory
In the old times, the medieval kings and queens would only visit the dentist just before their coronation. This is because they wanted their teeth crowned!
Santa hit a dragon and killed it whilst flying over medieval England...
... guess you could say he sleighed it
Which knight is the protector of foods?
Sir Anwrap
Once, a wizard had cursed a knight and turned him into a bird. To express his sorrow, he sang throughout the entire day because he had become a knightingle.
Why do medieval ghosts refuse to stop at McDonald's?
They prefer Wight Castle.
What attracts knights in shining armor even more than damsels in distress?
Magnets
Knights have always used one type of lamp since medieval times. These lamps are now called Knight Lamps.
If you go to Medieval Times and watch the jousts, there is a sir charge.
How did one become a medieval executioner?
You had to axe nicely.
What is the name of that knight who is very fond of the sea and spends most of his time at sea beaches? We call him Sir Fer.
What do you think is the name of the knight who unexpectedly turned up at the battle? His name is Sir Prize.
What did Medieval postmen wear?
Chain mail.
Why were people in the Medieval times so self absorbed?
Because they thought that they were the center of the universe.
Vincent Van Gogh met a knight during the latter part of his life, who inspired him to draw one of his most famous paintings - The Starry Knight.
King Arthur had a knight in charge of determining property boundaries.
Sir Veyor
Digging trenches during the middle ages was seen as a great honor because it showed someone's shovelry!
How do Medieval sheep protest prisons?
They storm the baaaastille.
Why is the Medieval period often called the Dark Ages?
Because there were so many knights.
I accidentally sat on a medieval stained glass window at the antique store...
That was a royal pane in the ass.
What punishment do legs get in the medieval era?
decapita-shin
The medieval queen was unhappy when she saw that it was pouring outside. She sighed to herself, "This could be another reigny day."
What type of weapon does a vegetable knight use?
A-spear-iguess
Did you see that their is a Medieval play about menstruation?
It's a period piece
What do you call a medieval siege machine that throws flowers?
A trebouquet
My brother was reading a book about a medieval castle that always had its drawbridge up. Unfortunately, he couldn't really get into the book!
Why did Arthur have a round table?
So nobody could corner him!
If I lived in medieval times, I'd be a tavern guard.
I've always been known for my Inn-Security.
I always knew that some knights had names that described their personality (like Lancelot the Brave), but I didn't realise nuns did that too until I became one...
I was Nun the Wiser.
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