Did you know Doctor Frankenstein used to be a lonely, lonely man?
Then he learned how to make friends.
What happened when the ice monster had a furious row with Frankenstein?
He gave him the cold shoulder!
How does Frankenstein speak?
Frankly.
Which musical group did Frankenstein not like at all?
The Village People.
Who brings the monsters their babies?
Frankenstork.
How did Frankenstein know Jesus was coming for a visit?
He used his frankincense.
How does Frankenstein jump-start his day?
With a shock of lighting.
How did Dr. Frankenstein pay the men who built his monster?
On a piece rate.
Frankenstein’s monster was really worried one day.
“Pull yourself together”, said Frankenstein.
We all know Albert Einstein was a genius…
But his brother Frank was a monster.
What did Dr.Frankenstein say when his monster spat on him?
It’s saliva!
Frankenstein's monster and the bride of Frankenstein sit down for dinner
Bride: How come you never help with the dinner
Frankenstein: I did
Bride: How?
Frankenstein: I did the mash...
Bride: Don't you dare
Sad to hear that Baron von Frankenstein has given up on his dream of being an actor.
He couldn’t get the parts.
What happened when Dr. Frankenstein swallowed some uranium?
He got atomic ache.
Who did Frankenstein take to the prom?
His ghoul friend.
What is Dr. Frankenstein’s favorite part of a company?
Human resources.
What is Frankenstein’s favorite cheese?
Muenster.
Where does a thrifty Frankenstein get his limbs?
At the second-hand store.
What’s Frankenstein’s favorite food?
Frankenfurters.
What do you call a clever monster?
Frank Einstein.
Was there a spark between Frankenstein and his bride?
Yes, he simply couldn’t resistor.
People keep asking me why I’m working for Dr. Frankenstein.
I’m just trying to make a living.
What was the inscription on the tomb of Frankenstein’s monster?
HERE LIES FRANKENSTEIN’S MONSTER. MAY HE REST IN PIECES.
What monster plays the most April Fool’s jokes?
Prankenstein!
How does Frankenstein eat his dinner?
He bolts it down.
What’s the best time for Frankenstein to go to a party?
Fright now.
Dr. Frankenstein just placed an order on Amazon.
It wasn't expensive, but I imagine the shipping cost him an arm and a leg.
People say Frankenstein’s monster had a temper…
But actually he was surprisingly level-headed.
What kind of dog did Frankenstein want for Christmas?
A lab.
Why is Frankenstein always asking for help?
He’s looking for someone to give him a hand.
Why doesn’t Frankenstein go on airplanes?
He can’t get past the airport metal detector.
Dr. Frankenstein must have been pretty buff.
He was a bodybuilder, after all.
What did Dr. Frankenstein say when Pinocchio’s nose grew?
IT’S A LIEEEEE!!
How do you know Frankenstein is tired?
He’s dead on his feet.
What did Frankenstein say when he was struck by lightning?
Great! A jolt to the bolt!
Frankenstein entered a body-building competition…
And soon found he had seriously misunderstood the objective.
I love making new friends.
That’s why I studied under Dr. Frankenstein.
Dr. Frankenstein: Igor, have you seen my latest invention? It’s a new pill consisting of 50 percent glue and 50 percent aspirin.
Igor: But what is it for?
Dr. Frankenstein: For monsters with splitting headaches.
What is Frankenstein’s favorite cheese?
Muenster.
Why is Frankenstein such good fun?
Because he soon has you in stitches.
Why did Frankenstein’s monster go to a psychiatrist?
He thought he had a screw loose.
What do you call it when Dr. Frankenstein makes tea?
A monstrositea.
Why did Frankenstein tiptoe past the medicine cabinet?
He didn’t want to wake the sleeping pills!
What do you call the Frankenstein of the Gardening world?
An A-botan-ation.
What happened when Frankenstein’s monster first met his girlfriend?
It was love at first fright.
Why did Dr. Frankenstein hire Igor as his assistant?
He had a hunch about him.
Why did Frankenstein turn to solar?
For the free charge.
Why did Frankenstein’s monster give up boxing?
Because he didn’t want to spoil his looks.
Why was Frankenstein’s monster always being arrested?
He was so easy to charge.
Why didn’t Dr. Frankenstein ever make a second monster?
Because he just didn’t have the guts to do it again.
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