What’s the best time for Frankenstein to go to a party?
Fright now.
What happened when Dr. Frankenstein swallowed some uranium?
He got atomic ache.
We all know Albert Einstein was a genius…
But his brother Frank was a monster.
Which musical group did Frankenstein not like at all?
The Village People.
What is Dr. Frankenstein’s favorite part of a company?
Human resources.
What happened when Frankenstein’s monster first met his girlfriend?
It was love at first fright.
What should you do when you see Frankenstein walking towards you?
Make a bolt for it.
People keep asking me why I’m working for Dr. Frankenstein.
I’m just trying to make a living.
Why is Frankenstein always asking for help?
He’s looking for someone to give him a hand.
Where does a thrifty Frankenstein get his limbs?
At the second-hand store.
What do you call a clever monster?
Frank Einstein.
Dr. Frankenstein must have been pretty buff.
He was a bodybuilder, after all.
How do you know Frankenstein is tired?
He’s dead on his feet.
What tree monster prowls the forest?
Frankenpine.
Was there a spark between Frankenstein and his bride?
Yes, he simply couldn’t resistor.
What do you call it when Dr. Frankenstein makes tea?
A monstrositea.
What monster plays the most April Fool’s jokes?
Prankenstein!
Did you know Doctor Frankenstein used to be a lonely, lonely man?
Then he learned how to make friends.
How did Dr. Frankenstein pay the men who built his monster?
On a piece rate.
Why is Frankenstein’s monster so popular?
He’s a real people person.
Why did Frankenstein tiptoe past the medicine cabinet?
He didn’t want to wake the sleeping pills!
Dr. Frankenstein just placed an order on Amazon.
It wasn't expensive, but I imagine the shipping cost him an arm and a leg.
What is Frankenstein’s favorite cheese?
Muenster.
Who did Frankenstein take to the prom?
His ghoul friend.
How does Frankenstein jump-start his day?
With a shock of lighting.
Frankenstein entered a body-building competition…
And soon found he had seriously misunderstood the objective.
Why is Frankenstein such good fun?
Because he soon has you in stitches.
What did Frankenstein say when he was struck by lightning?
Great! A jolt to the bolt!
Why did Frankenstein turn to solar?
For the free charge.
What did one of Frankenstein’s ears say to the other?
I didn’t know we lived on the same block.
What did Dr.Frankenstein say when his monster spat on him?
It’s saliva!
Frankenstein's monster and the bride of Frankenstein sit down for dinner
Bride: How come you never help with the dinner
Frankenstein: I did
Bride: How?
Frankenstein: I did the mash...
Bride: Don't you dare
Why didn’t Dr. Frankenstein ever make a second monster?
Because he just didn’t have the guts to do it again.
What’s Frankenstein’s favorite food?
Frankenfurters.
Why was Frankenstein’s monster always being arrested?
He was so easy to charge.
Why doesn’t Frankenstein go on airplanes?
He can’t get past the airport metal detector.
What happened when the ice monster had a furious row with Frankenstein?
He gave him the cold shoulder!
People say Frankenstein’s monster had a temper…
But actually he was surprisingly level-headed.
Dr. Frankenstein: Igor, have you seen my latest invention? It’s a new pill consisting of 50 percent glue and 50 percent aspirin.
Igor: But what is it for?
Dr. Frankenstein: For monsters with splitting headaches.
Who brings the monsters their babies?
Frankenstork.
What kind of dog did Frankenstein want for Christmas?
A lab.
Who will Frankenstein’s monster take to the dance?
Any old girl he can dig up.
How did Frankenstein know Jesus was coming for a visit?
He used his frankincense.
Sad to hear that Baron von Frankenstein has given up on his dream of being an actor.
He couldn’t get the parts.
Why did Dr. Frankenstein hire Igor as his assistant?
He had a hunch about him.
Why did Frankenstein’s monster go to a psychiatrist?
He thought he had a screw loose.
Why did Frankenstein’s monster give up boxing?
Because he didn’t want to spoil his looks.
What do you call the Frankenstein of the Gardening world?
An A-botan-ation.
How does Frankenstein eat his dinner?
He bolts it down.
Frankenstein’s monster was really worried one day.
“Pull yourself together”, said Frankenstein.
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